BREAKING: Legend Nedd Brockmann proof you can move from Cottesloe to Bondi and not be a massive wanker

Brockmann has done what most men couldn’t. Nay, most mere mortals couldn’t. He made the shift from Cottesloe to Bondi without being a massive stain on the s-bend of society.

Quite the opposite, his unfettered dedication saw him achieve a feat few could replicate. All for a good cause. Far be it from the usual PER – SYD wannabe socialite, this man is a beast. A Lord.

A modern day Knight compared to the wolf of wankstreet who gets a job in Shitney on his father’s will. Or Courtney Cuntdasian who moves over to network with Roxy Jawhogivesafuck and take selfies at Icebergs. Gross.

We spoke to the antithesis of Nedd who made the journey from the golden triangle to Bondi to “make that paper, brah”, he told The Times,

“You know I’m ballin’ man, Uranium sector just heating up. Should we get some girls in? My treat? Oi that nostril looks thirsty brah”

It was a painful exchange but the free Coke helped us realise how important men like Nedd are for society and how pointless Sydney social climbing fuckwits are in general.

On’ya Nedd. True ‘orse.

If you enjoyed this please consider supporting Brockmann’s chosen charity HERE.