Ms Bad Girls Advice

Sche’ree is a part of several female-only advice pages whose members consist of a who’s who of outer suburban full-time mummies that know their way around a Supre stock clearance sale.

This Sunday marks the 4 week anniversary of her relationship with some loser she met in the pokies section of Crown. Needless to say, things are getting pretty serious. She decides to share her good news with her gals,

“Bad gurls i need ya advice!!! Met a new bloke.. Worshipz the ground i walk on cos im A KWEEN lol cooks, cleans and has a big Work Cover payout!!! lol and aniwaiz gotta make sure this guiz up ta skratch aiii an can look after me n lil Xakarie…. Wuld u bad girls trust a dude with a dik like this, fkn coktail weenie lol?”

She attaches a dick pic that she begged Kyron to send her. Now, one person’s gross invasion of privacy is another person’s top rating roast post. The girls delight in making cruel yet witless small dick jokes about the man.

See, in respect to Facebook peer advice, Sche’ree takes after the Mamamia school of weight loss thought and believed a good public shaming is just what the doctor ordered.

It’s been 6 weeks, and her relationship remains unmolested by the strong arm of a court order. This is bliss. That is until she flies into a jealous rage while stalking Kyron on a jobless Tuesday.

Sche’ree reaches out to her gals once again, and like a pap-smear, she scrapes the bottom of the cuntbarrel,

“FMLLLL me new man is ALREADY CHEATIN fkn piked up some skank from the forum ai. Last dude to mess with this BAD GIRL got pepper sprayd wut shuld i do bad girls?! Lol”

Suggestions ranged from violent brutality such as “put his dick in a GHD” to diabolical “stash some ice in his car and call the cops lol”. It is an unprotected orgy of overreaction, and one bad girl feels she needs to say something, “maybe ask him who it was?”

The group turn on her like they were Wil Anderson busting for a piss during take-off. She is vilified, ostracised and finally banned for life. Next time think of something to shove up his urethra ya bloody lefty.

That settles it, the bad girls have worked Sche’ree into a revenge frenzy, and she has decided that Kyron will be getting a little “reminder” about what a kween she is. As soon as he comes home, she grabs a cruiser bottle and chucks it at his head.

Much like North Korea’s missile project, she was confident, but her launch was short and altogether pretty impotent. Kyron protests, “what the fuck?”

Sche’ree explains why she tried to bottle him. Kyron tells her that was his sister. Yikes. The following day Kyron gets a VRO against Sche’ree, and the papers are served on her promptly.

Perhaps a lesser woman would feel some shame. Not Sche’ree though, she posts the papers on her advice pages and thrives on the thrill of being a fairly atrocious specimen.