The Freo Doctor Promises To Volunteer And “Blow” WA Hospital Crisis Out Of The Water

After receiving a rockstar welcome yesterday, the prodigal breeze that abandoned Perth when we needed him most has agreed to step up and do what needs to be done – blow our hospital crisis out of the water.

A spokesperson for The Freo Doctor told The Bell Tower Times,

“Upon reflection, The Doctor has realised that perhaps he could’ve timed his little holiday from Perth better. He maintains that the blame should squarely be on his arch-nemesis Dr. Easterly but concedes he could’ve done more”

While gently blowing over the faces of now-refreshed West Aussies, The Doctor heard many complaints about the WA Health System being a steaming pile of shit. 

And well, what a lot of people don’t understand about the iconic sea breeze is that he actually is a practitioner of medicine. 

He’s a Doctor of draughts, a fellow of fresh, a consultant of cool, and a surgeon of simmering down that hot summer heat and kicking back with a resident of refreshment. 

Needless to say, The Doctor is more than qualified to roll up its proverbial sleeves, step into our overburdened health care system and literally, “blow” this crisis away. 

A leading Cardiologist has welcomed the announcement stating, 

“Yeah look, it’s always an honour to work with The Doctor, nothing like walking out of a 18-hour long surgery to consult with my cool breeze colleague”

A top ED consultant told us,

“It’s about time The Doctor did more than blow up some skirts at Milligans on a Friday arvo, in fact, if he put in work before now maybe Milligans wouldn’t be a COVID clinic now”

A spokesperson for The Doctor told us,

“Blowing away the crisis in the WA Health system is just the beginning. He’s been more than flattered at the praise he’s received from returning last night and is thinking about taking a run at the top spot one day”

Long live The Doctor is all Perth can say right now. 

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?

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