REPORT: there sure is a lot of “working from home” going on today

Evidence of Perth’s industrious work ethic can be seen from beach car parks to golf courses today as the city hits a yearly record for the number of citizens “working from home”. 

Conservative estimates suggest about 4 people have actually gone into work today in the CBD. Although curiously the reduction in attendance has not affected the overall vibe of the CBD. We spoke to a manager of a small firm on Adelaide Terrace. He told The Times,

“My entire staff said they are working from home today. Which is funny because I can’t seem to reach any of them. Samantha picked up a call and I’m pretty sure I heard the unmistakable sound of a Cruiser getting slammed in the background but maybe I am hearing things”

We spoke to Adam who has “worked from home” at a variety of locations today. Starting his busy day at the beach before tackling some important future projections on a mate’s jet ski. He’s now crunching the numbers at the pub. He told The Times,

“If I work from home any harder I might pass out mate. Been absolutely flat out today and the boss once said he didn’t know if he could trust us. Sure showed him up”

Indeed. Pubs across the city can attest to the extreme levels of working from home as they have recorded a record number of impromptu “work conferences” today. We spoke to a bartender at a busy inner-city pub who told The Times,

“Yeah, clearly a lot of business is going on. Corporate cards are just flying around. Some dude told me that this is how business was done before apparently stumbling into the urinal. That was at just 1 o’clock”

PSA: If you’re hot, they’re hot. Public urged to ensure British coworkers have water & shade today 

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?