Coles & Woolworths shareholders are licking their lips at the news minimum wage will increase by 3.5%. Why you may ask?
Well, it’s because they know the mighty Colesworth profit machine will turn the nation’s battler’s windfall into their own windfall. An insider told The Times,
“Do you smell that? That’s a supply chain issue coming ha ha. I don’t know what, maybe flooding somewhere? Who gives a fark either way expect groceries to go up by at least 3.5% Even more given Colesworth have to pay their own staff more”
Of course, the official line coming from the companies is that they have never and will never shamelessly profiteer. However, one battler seems to think that might not be true. Tony told The Times,
“I’m beginning to think these companies aren’t the good guys they claim to be. I’m a big Coke Zero man and now they do this alternating “special” on blocks which forces me to drink Pepsi Max one week. Why would they do that to a bloke?”
Why Tony no doubt has it tough, there are far more doing it far tougher than just a refreshing can of assorted chemicals. We spoke to a mother of 4 who said her weekly shop was already nipping at the heels of $400. She told us,
“At first I was excited by the announcement as I work part time but then I remembered that my employer will just find a way to cut hours and every opportunistic company will find ways to raise prices now they believe there is more disposable income. It’s frankly depressing”
That is it.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?