England credit rigorous midweek training sessions at Revolver for improved Boxing Day form

It appears a completely new and improved English cricket outfit has emerged for the Boxing Day test. 

Rather than suck up the stadium like a dexie’d up mother wielding a Dyson before guests arrive, they have got the Aussies on the ropes.

A source close to the English cricketers say the big difference was ditching the foolishness of Noosa beach bars for some extremely rigorous practice sessions at Melbourne’s famous Revs. Adding,  

“Ask anyone who has spent a few nights at Revs, they’ll tell you they come out leaner, fitter and real toey for a bit of action. That’s what we are seeing today, England are frisky”

One member of the public who saw them there told The Times that they were really losing themselves on the dancefloor and tapping back into what made bazball great. It was like the spirit of Freddy Flintoff came to touch them.

Critics of the team still suggest that the nets or practice games would still be better places to prepare than nightclubs. 

This was fiercely rebuked by the English who said that hitting up Revs in the week leading up to the test was classic Bazball and if Duckett had just been able to hold his piss a bit better the prep would’ve worked before Adelaide. 

As unorthodox as it is, it does appear to be rather successful today. 

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