First, it was fuel, now it’s something much bleaker for humanity – a shortage of cheese sausages is imminent in Australia after a ship full of the precious cargo found itself stuck in the Strait of Hormuz.
Initially, the cargo ship had permission to pass through on its way to Perth, Western Australia, however Trump’s epic bedshit of a “ceasefire” meant the Strait was closed again by Iranian forces.
At the time of writing this article, Perth only has 6 days worth of cheese sausages and that’s IF people don’t start panic buying.
We spoke to a smoko-expert who said the supply crisis is likely going to see the price of cheese sausages skyrocket. Telling The Times,
“I think by Saturday the price of a single cheese sausage could be over $10. Consumers are being advised to report any obvious price gouging of deep fried, artery clogging delights to the ACCC for investigation. This is Australia and its every citizens right to indulge in one of these greasy heart tornados in peace and away from the eyes of God”
To give the public a slither of hope, Prime Minister Albanese has addressed the nation and said all efforts were being made to find alternative sources of the smoko treat.
However, the supply is going to hit other nation’s who also rely on the snack to get them through a tough day. In particular, New Zealand who have sent out an SOS for the snack over threats from the hot knifing community to tear down Parliament House.
Things are getting real grim now, thanks Trump.