The streets of Kalgoorlie are alive with the unmistakable armour of Tarocash and regret after the 2025 Kalgoorlie Cup.
It’s the sort of day that unites blow-ins from Perth with the gold tinted crust-ulation of the Goldfields most famous town.
We spoke to Aaron who told The Times that despite now being broke and his best races/wedding/Magistrates shirt being ruined, he’d do it all again, adding,
“Yewwww, what a day in Kal, I don’t remember a thing ha ha. I reckon I had fun though because I woke up on the side of the road with my jocks full of paydirt ha ha”
A Kalgoorlie woman also confirmed she had a great time despite succumbing to the methy-promises of a former flame. She told The Times,
“He’s such a smooth talker, he told me at the track that he had some good shard and would pay me back all the money he borrowed off me during our relationship after he won on the next horse, next thing I know, it’s just 2 sleeps until Xmas in the back of his Hilux”
While Kal locals were lucky enough to finally make it to their beds today, many blow-ins had to come to grips with the daunting ride home on The Prospector.
We spoke to one young man who was busy cleaning various bodily fluids off his white Tarocash dress shoes at the traino. He told The Times,
“Why did I think this was a good idea? 7 hours on a train after drinking more piss than Bear Grylls lost in a car park, ahhhhh”
Yeah, rookie error pal.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?