The Power Tripper – usually promoted out of necessity rather than merit, the power tripper will take out all their insecurities on their staff by being as pleasant as a gastro outbreak in a submarine.

Exactly the kind of shiteater that would micro-manage you after asking you to shine their shoes. Known to become visually aroused by looking at the “manager” addition to their name-tag in the mirror.

The Ageing Alpha Male – legend has it that before he got his airconditioned portable office, old mate would pick up a tool before smoko. Of course, no one has ever seen the man in action.

Odds are the only time you will deal with him is when he is punching a dart while watching you work and telling you that he could do it better. Whether he could or not is purely hypothetical, as the Dockers will win a flag before anyway sees any proof of it.

Mr. Cool – he sees Ricky Gervais’ character in the office as a blueprint rather than a cautionary tale. Despite pushing 40, he still believes he can still it slam it with the 20-somethings in the break room.

Don’t think he’s cool? Watch him drop an F-bomb in a meeting, wonder why he is still going to Splendour in the Grass and if you are really lucky, be around when he acts cooler than an Eskimo’s driveway for calling after-work drinks 15 minutes earlier than usual.

The Rich Kid – he has a “vision”, he has set up a “startup” and his vague food-sharing / clothing apparel app is going to be a “game changer”. All you do know is that the job market sucks and this idiot has the funding of a parental unit that is sick of him disgracing the family name with his unemployment.

So you sign on. Cons: he has no idea what he is doing and will ultimately drag you down with him, Pros: coke at the X-mas party.

The Baby Boomer – if he isn’t taking another day off to hit the golf course he is bellowing for help to navigate the complexities of his email inbox after 7 lunchtime wines.

He will pay you peanuts and then call you a lazy millennial for not making financial butter to spread across the property market his kin so thoroughly toasted.