England have entered full damage control after the controversial style of aggressive test batting has been declared dead.
Thus to protect the sanctity of English cricket, ol Sausage fingers has decreed that any future acts of Bazball are now a treasonable offence.
Furthermore, any mention of Bazball will be erased from the Cricket records with failure to comply with the Royal Decree to be met with the severe penalties.
We spoke with an advisor to the King who told The Times that such extreme action was warranted given the embarrassment Bazball has caused the nation. Adding,
“Bazball is a blight on this nation. A fetid, overflowing chamberpot of shame! Aggressive batting? In TEST CRICKET? Why I never *aristocratic jowl shaking sounds*”
Pursuant to the Royal Decree, all English players will be required to adopt a style of test cricket that doesn’t result in losing the Ashes in 11 days.
Not everyone supports the decree. With some commentators saying that prohibition never works and will only force Bazball underground and be harder to stop.
One expert told The Times,
“We don’t want to see lower divisions become a hotbed of Bazball. With new talent hiding their true self until they get to the big stage and then BAM, play an absolutely ridiculous, impatient shot and get skittled by Starc”
They believe Bazball should be tightly regulated and even taxed.
Much to think about.
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