Some of Australia’s biggest copper miners are looking to the industrious population of Mandurah who have demonstrated they are highly capable of extracting copper.
In a recruitment push, all sleep dodgers, petty crims and sticky fingered tradies are being offered lucrative FIFO contracts to bring their unique abilities to the copper mines and increase efficiency.
A recruiter who is currently interviewing candidates told The Times they are looking for copper extractors with the X factor. Adding,
“Mining and crime have a lot in common. It can be dirty, the hours are long and you’re under pressure to get results. We’ve seen what a single Mandurah resident can do to a street light so imagine what a horde of them can do in our pit”
We tracked down a successful candidate who refused to give his name. He told The Times,
“You could drop me in the middle of the jungle with a pair of wire strippers and I’d come out with about a 8ball worth of copper. It’s in my DNA mate”
Naturally, we asked what would stop the usual suspects from stealing copper from the mine itself. We were told,
“Way ahead of you. We have a number of decoy light poles containing a bit of copper that they can release their criminal urges on. Should keep em happy enough and they’ll stick around to keep extracting the valuable stuff for us from the ground”
Bold strategy indeed.
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