A Cottesloe man has conceded that he couldn’t possibly start his fitness journey without first investing in several thousands of dollars worth of running gear.
Worried about the state of himself, Thomas has been contemplating running up and down Marine Parade. However, he fears that without the requistite look he may be confused for a homeless man. He told The Times,
“You’ve got two types of runners on Marine Parade mate, the shirtless wonder and the bloke with all the gear, no idea and running a km in 10 minutes. My rig isn’t ready for the former so the latter is what I’ll need to be”
It turns out Thomas’ fears are well founded. Just last week a blow-in wearing cheap Fila running shorts and a regular Billabong singlet was reported to police on the suspicion of being poor.
Of course, the financial outlay isn’t what is stopping young Thomas – heir of generational wealth. It’s that once he gets all the fancy gear he’ll have to come up with a new excuse for delaying his foray into some light exercise. In his words,
“I’m really enjoying my pub era. I just got a new set of business cards and I’m rising through the nepo ranks at the family business, so yeah, I feel my place in the world is buying expensive bottles of champagne on dad’s black AMEX”
Fair enough then.
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