England has sensationally claimed they would’ve won The Ashes 5-0 if it wasn’t for the umpire assistance technology snicko.
According to England, the couple of snicko flavoured shit sandwiches they had to eat is the only reason for them not winning every single test match convincingly.
You only have to look at today’s session where Weatherald was perhaps lucky to have fallen between the cracks of snicko. Not to mention Carey’s second chance in Radelaide. An Englishman told The Times,
“If Weatherald was given out then, there would’ve been a massive collapse and England would have won the fifth test. You can’t tell me different, that was the ONLY reason Aussies won at the SCG”
An English cricket expert told The Times that based on this indisputable fact, they are claiming a moral victory. Adding,
“Can any Aussie truly say that they batted, bowled and fielded better than England? You’re having a laugh! If the Aussie snicko hadn’t been influenced by the spirit of cheating Aussies then we’d have a very different far more accurate result”
It should be noted that the snicko technology also granted England a reprieve in Adelaide however they don’t want to talk about that.
It’s too late to tell whether England will officially report that they won The Ashes based on this convincing moral victory argument.
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