The English Cricket Team have sent a powerful message to its haters by starting their vigorous preparation for the 2027 Ashes right now.
As reported by The Times, the boys are stranded in Australia after being unable to catch a plane either.
So this has given them plenty of time to get stuck into their trademark preparation strategy – sinking some cold ones in sunny Australia.
We spoke to a witness at the Sydney Airport bar who said the team was clearly dedicated to their training schedule. Adding,
“Oh yeah the boys were getting around it. It’s all about sticking to your plan and seeing it through. Obviously England would’ve won if Australian minds could comprehend Bazball so it wasn’t their fault, ya know? So why change a morally winning prep strategy?”
Some in the sports media criticised England for their boozy trip to Noosa midway through the series. While others said they just didn’t get the formula right. One expert told The Times,
“Maybe they went too easy in Noosa. Has anyone considered that? Cricket, at its heart, is a sport played by athletes who have hard earned thirsts. It’s the culture. Maybe England need to really step it up and get the beers in”
Maybe they do.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?