The Western Australian Government has reinstated a ban on the yewwww-community “sending it” amid concerning ambulance ramping statistics.
Ambulance ramping figures have become a sore point for the WA Government so they are having to get creative with how they address it.
A source close to WA Health told The Times,
“Activities like driving beyond one’s skill level and getting gee’d up at kick ons account for a fair percentage of emergency admissions, if they could just stop those presentations coming in for a few months the figures might look a little less worse”
The measures were first introduced back in 2022 before the WA border reopened and the health bosses were concerned at the state of the emergency departments. At the time saying,
“To shoot straight with you, we’re shitting ourselves ahead of the 5th February border reopening. It’s a dog’s breakfast in the emergency departments as it is. So it’d be a massive help if we could reduce the number of hospital admissions from blokes who have been honking on the yeww-pipe all day and try to do a backflip off a verandah into a pool or whatever it is they like to do”
So once again, the WA Government is begging people to avoid needing an ambulance due to an ill-fated send.
We spoke to Kai who said there was “absolutely no chance” he was going to obey the ban especially given the generous downpour of rain. He told The Times,
“Wet weather sends are my speciality and it’s not my fault the health system hasn’t kept up, I’m an artist and I won’t be stopped”
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?