The AFL’s new illicit drug policy has unexpectedly resulted in a major win for the balding community after buzz cuts were tipped to make as strong comeback in 2027.
Under the revised policy, players will be subjected to 2 hair tests per year to detect the presence of illicit substances in their systems.
Naturally, the less hair one has, the less historical snitching your hair can do on you, thus the buzz cut.
We spoke to a source close to the AFL haircut community and said it was a welcome change to some of the chops getting about these days,
“Parents are going to be stoked their kids want a nice easy buzz cut and not some intricately barbered fade and mullet and all sorts of expensive barbering, you can do the buzz cut at home and look like an AFL star”
The AFL says it didn’t consider all that but at the end of the day, kids need to understand that there is no place in the game for illicit drugs, as every dollar spent on partying could be a dollar you dump into their beloved partners, Sportsbet et al.
Get your priorities straight kids!
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