As MinRes gives itself a giant pat on the back for using a tiny fraction of its enormous profit to give its workers a comfortable work life, a local mine camp pest is facing his own challenges.
Big Dave comes from a long line of mining camp door slammers and vows to intensify his efforts in this spacious new accommodation. He told The Times,
“Yeah nah, fark, I won’t be silenced ay, door slamming is an art form and I’m a regular Picunto, if these think spacing out the rooms is gonna stop me being heard they got another thing coming”
Surprisingly, the media didn’t talk to Big Dave while running their cash for comment spruik of the mining camp. However, sources close to Big Dave say a storm is brewing.
We spoke to a local TREN-ape who said he was surprised to see Big Dave in the gym during his R&R. He told The Times,
“Always thought Davo just hit the piss on his week off but he was at Revo every day working on his right arm, never seen a bloke more motivated, he’s going to shake that resort to its core”
Not only has Big Dave been working on his arm strength, he’s also been working on his piss-muscles so that his stream permeates the silence of the camp at 2am.
Good luck Big Dave.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?