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Monday, November 03, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 

    Authorities have put out an alert that it is highly likely you may fail a piss-test tomorrow if you were within a kilometre of the…

    Belle November 2, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS

    Royal Family tells loyal subjects that the most horrific punishment they could think of for Andrew was making him one of you

    The Royal Family has sent a clear message to its loyal subjects that a Royal being reduced to a filthy, shiteating member of the public…

    Belle October 31, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Boomers warned as Perth kid plans to dress as a Daylight Saving referendum for Halloween

    A young family has caused a stir today after previewing their kid’s Halloween costume on social media. To the horror of traditionally older or rural…

    Belle October 31, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Metallica confirm they are only coming to Perth to get their hands on a Belmont bloke who downloaded Enter Sandman on Napster in ’99

    Metallica fans are preparing for a big night this weekend. However, the band has said the concert is only a secondary objective. Their real objective…

    Belle October 30, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    James Blunt heard loudly claiming The Ashes on the Yanchep Line 

    James Blunt is in town for a concert tonight but wasted no time getting involved in the main recreational activity of his people.  Thus, the…

    Belle October 30, 2025
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Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

Pajero driver realises he was destined to drive one after learning what it means in Spanish

Belle April 5, 2024 motoring

John, a proud Pajero driver, is feeling enlightened after an altercation on the road turned into a profound epiphany this morning. After carelessly drifting into…

View More Pajero driver realises he was destined to drive one after learning what it means in Spanish
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

Seasoned campaigner making people feel a bit uncomfortable with his stories from The Clink back in the day 

Belle April 4, 2024

An ageing uncle at a family do has predictably sucked back one too many bottles of sauce and in a desperate bid to hang on…

View More Seasoned campaigner making people feel a bit uncomfortable with his stories from The Clink back in the day 
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

“AFL Demolition Round” Confirmed For WA After SA Secure Gather Round For 3 Years

Belle April 3, 2024 WA Culture

Western Australians can rejoice that they’ll be getting their own week of footy next season after learning that Gather Round will remain in South Australia…

View More “AFL Demolition Round” Confirmed For WA After SA Secure Gather Round For 3 Years
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

Perth shocked as luxury 4WD owner decides not to park like a C U Next Tuesday

Belle April 3, 2024

In what’s being considered a “world first” an owner of a luxury Range Rover 4WD has decided to park with competency, respect, and grace this…

View More Perth shocked as luxury 4WD owner decides not to park like a C U Next Tuesday
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

REPORT: Yeti Rambler owner thinks he’s better than you

Belle April 2, 2024

You can imagine how much of a giga-chud Simon felt like using an inferior drink bottle for the past 30 years of his life. He…

View More REPORT: Yeti Rambler owner thinks he’s better than you
Reckons Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS

IN FOCUS: Surviving Work After Another Long Weekend Bender

Belle April 2, 2024

Well, once again the cruel rotisserie of life has you over the morning coals and you’ve gone and cooked the bloody chook again. You are…

View More IN FOCUS: Surviving Work After Another Long Weekend Bender

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 
  • Royal Family tells loyal subjects that the most horrific punishment they could think of for Andrew was making him one of you
  • Boomers warned as Perth kid plans to dress as a Daylight Saving referendum for Halloween
  • Metallica confirm they are only coming to Perth to get their hands on a Belmont bloke who downloaded Enter Sandman on Napster in ’99
  • James Blunt heard loudly claiming The Ashes on the Yanchep Line 
  • Little shop selling expensive American snacks & stuff mysteriously pops up in Hakea after 2026 smoking ban announced

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