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Saturday, November 01, 2025
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS

    Royal Family tells loyal subjects that the most horrific punishment they could think of for Andrew was making him one of you

    The Royal Family has sent a clear message to its loyal subjects that a Royal being reduced to a filthy, shiteating member of the public…

    Belle October 31, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Boomers warned as Perth kid plans to dress as a Daylight Saving referendum for Halloween

    A young family has caused a stir today after previewing their kid’s Halloween costume on social media. To the horror of traditionally older or rural…

    Belle October 31, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Metallica confirm they are only coming to Perth to get their hands on a Belmont bloke who downloaded Enter Sandman on Napster in ’99

    Metallica fans are preparing for a big night this weekend. However, the band has said the concert is only a secondary objective. Their real objective…

    Belle October 30, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    James Blunt heard loudly claiming The Ashes on the Yanchep Line 

    James Blunt is in town for a concert tonight but wasted no time getting involved in the main recreational activity of his people.  Thus, the…

    Belle October 30, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Little shop selling expensive American snacks & stuff mysteriously pops up in Hakea after 2026 smoking ban announced

    Authorities are suspicious of a little shop that mysteriously popped up in Hakea prison ahead of the 2026 smoking ban.  Prison officers have said the…

    Belle October 30, 2025
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From the Zoo Uncategorized

IN FOCUS: Men Who Wear String Singlets “Stringlets”

Belle June 18, 2019

What came first the tribal tatt or the string singlet? It’s a question that has plagued gym-kind for years. All we know is that there…

View More IN FOCUS: Men Who Wear String Singlets “Stringlets”
From the Zoo Uncategorized

IN FOCUS: Skunk Wear

Belle June 7, 2019

They say some stars burn too bright. That some shops are too beautiful for this world. Skunk Wear in Perth CBD was one such shop.…

View More IN FOCUS: Skunk Wear
Unique & Other

The Perth Dog Thief

Belle May 22, 2019

It’s 2019, and the fur-baby-fication of society is almost fully complete. Tired of seeing our canine pals sniff around the arse-crack of speciesism, we elevated…

View More The Perth Dog Thief
From the Zoo BREAKING NEWS Uncategorized

BREAKING: Fair Work Rules it is Harassment to Bother a Tradie During Smoko

Belle May 21, 2019

A boilermaker has been awarded a large Red Roota combo and 2 darts after it was ruled that an employer has no jurisdiction over an…

View More BREAKING: Fair Work Rules it is Harassment to Bother a Tradie During Smoko
Futsal Perth WA
Sports, Auto & Hobbies

The Overcompetitive Social Sportsman

Belle May 17, 2019

In high school, Todd held the record for most tennis racquets smashed in a fit of rage. His poor sportsmanship was legendary. The product of…

View More The Overcompetitive Social Sportsman
From the Zoo Uncategorized

POSTCODES: Baldivis 6171

Belle May 17, 2019

Spend a wonderful day in Baldivis. A semi-rural suburb that is too close to Rockingham and not far enough away from Mandurah. A suburb that…

View More POSTCODES: Baldivis 6171

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Royal Family tells loyal subjects that the most horrific punishment they could think of for Andrew was making him one of you
  • Boomers warned as Perth kid plans to dress as a Daylight Saving referendum for Halloween
  • Metallica confirm they are only coming to Perth to get their hands on a Belmont bloke who downloaded Enter Sandman on Napster in ’99
  • James Blunt heard loudly claiming The Ashes on the Yanchep Line 
  • Little shop selling expensive American snacks & stuff mysteriously pops up in Hakea after 2026 smoking ban announced
  • AFL vows to not rest until it has alienated every single fan with needless rule changes 

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  • Perth Driver Accused Of Being A Witch After Failing To Slam Brakes Upon Entering Tunnel
  • Leering Tradie Alleges He Was Catfished After Driver Of P-Plated Suzuki Swift Turned Out To Be Middle Aged Man
  • Crack team of Pilbara miners sent to UK to assure them their heatwave was nothing 
  • Moving down train carriage far too similar to merging for Perth to feel comfortable attempting
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