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Tuesday, July 28, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    AFL Denies Harley Reid is Umpired Unfairly After a 50 Is Paid Against Him at Bunnings

    The AFL has vehemently denied Harley Reid is being umpired unfairly after it was revealed the young mid fielder gave away a 50 while shopping…

    Belle July 28, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

    WA reveals winning WA/SA border design after public consultation

    Western Australia has revealed the long-awaited refresh of the WA/SA border sign in border village will include the Cockburn faces – a nod to one…

    Belle July 28, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Technology & Finance

    Blissful Calm to Fall Over Australia as Tin-Foilers Switch Off Their Phones to Avoid AusAlert

    Australia is set to experience a rare yet fleeting calm today as the tin-foil brigade switch off their phones to avoid receiving the AusAlert warning…

    Belle July 27, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Technology & Finance

    Supermarkets Forced to Put Special Notices on Toilet Paper Ahead of Tomorrow’s Emergency Alert Test

    Major Australian supermarkets have been forced to take proactive action to manage toilet paper stock ahead of tomorrow’s AusAlert warning test. Despite the advanced warning…

    Belle July 26, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Owner of Kings Awning Shocked to Learn it Actually Pulls Out

    An owner of a Kings Awning has been left absolutely stunned today after learning the piece of kit bolted to his 4WD permanently actually serves…

    Belle July 25, 2026
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BREAKING NEWS Featured

Qantas to Scalp GF Tickets for Thrice the Price – “It wouldn’t feel like a grand final if we didn’t rip off West Aussies”

Belle September 9, 2021

Qantas executives have been unable to sleep since the AFL announced the 2021 Grand Final would be played in Perth this year.  Ripping off West…

View More Qantas to Scalp GF Tickets for Thrice the Price – “It wouldn’t feel like a grand final if we didn’t rip off West Aussies”
BREAKING NEWS Featured

“Trees are a hoax” – Clive to Launch HC Challenge to Force WA to Continue Logging Native Forests

Belle September 9, 2021

Sources from within the Palmer camp say the rotund litigation pest was livid that WA dared to create policy without first checking with him.  In…

View More “Trees are a hoax” – Clive to Launch HC Challenge to Force WA to Continue Logging Native Forests
BREAKING NEWS Featured

AFL Backtrack on Cancelling Grand Final Parade After Seeing NORTHBRIDGE Sign

Belle September 7, 2021

Perth was shocked to hear that the AFL had ruled against staging a Grand Final parade in Perth due to terminal butthurt-itis, “terrorism” concerns, and…

View More AFL Backtrack on Cancelling Grand Final Parade After Seeing NORTHBRIDGE Sign
scarborough beach perth
BREAKING NEWS Featured

30 y/o Scarborough turbo shocked after realising beach body isn’t quite there yet

Belle September 7, 2021

Despite 6 months of neglect, local man Kyle inexplicably reckoned his rig was ready for the big stage at Scarborough today. How wrong he was. …

View More 30 y/o Scarborough turbo shocked after realising beach body isn’t quite there yet
From the Zoo Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS

IN FOCUS: Cum-trees (aka Ornamental Pears)

Belle September 6, 2021

If you’ve ever been walking down the street and suddenly get hit in the nostrils by a strong stank of baby-batter you could be forgiven…

View More IN FOCUS: Cum-trees (aka Ornamental Pears)
BREAKING NEWS Featured

REPORT: Dôme Café Really Likes the Look of that Waterside Location in Your Suburb

Belle September 4, 2021

Yesterday, we received a report that a Dôme Café location scout was seen licking his lips, rubbing his hands together, and announcing that he wanted…

View More REPORT: Dôme Café Really Likes the Look of that Waterside Location in Your Suburb

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TRENDING NEWS

  • AFL Denies Harley Reid is Umpired Unfairly After a 50 Is Paid Against Him at Bunnings
  • WA reveals winning WA/SA border design after public consultation
  • Blissful Calm to Fall Over Australia as Tin-Foilers Switch Off Their Phones to Avoid AusAlert
  • Supermarkets Forced to Put Special Notices on Toilet Paper Ahead of Tomorrow’s Emergency Alert Test
  • Owner of Kings Awning Shocked to Learn it Actually Pulls Out
  • Rogue AI Model Self-Terminates After Hacking Perth Smart Freeway Data

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