In a two-pronged plan to attract Italian tourists and help bring some familiar life back to Freo, Marko has pitched the joy of “cap laps” on his recent trip to Rome.
Perth’s non-stop flight to Rome has presented a unique opportunity to make “cap laps” great again. With one WA Government insider eagerly rubbing their hands together and allegedly saying, “it’s time, its fkn time baby”.
Sources close to the Premier said Marko spruiked the much-loved tradition of WA-born Italians but feared without a bit of a push he feared diners on the strip would be enjoying their meals without having their serenity blown apart by an obnoxious muffler or sound system.
The plan is expected to not only breathe life into Fremantle but also the local car modification industries. A spokesperson for the Premier explained,
“There’s more to cap laps than just driving. You need the right hardware. So we expect Italian tourists to heavily modify their Silvia or VL. Sure, some will borrow their relatives but we’re hoping some wealthier tourists really submerge themselves in our culture by creating their own rolling sound violation”
WA likened it to wealthy tourists hiring a beautiful BMW to enjoy Germany’s autobahn. Dubbing the Cappuccino Strip – WA’s autobahn for loud flogs who like to honk at women. It just needs a little help getting back to its former glory.
By all accounts, the Italian politicians were highly impressed with WA’s pitch. With one Italian senator saying it’s time for their people to experience the rich cultural footprint they have left abroad.
A spokesperson for the Italian senator told The Times,
“Cap laps are the trees that grew from the cultural seeds our ancestors gifted to you. Now it’s time for a whole new generation to enjoy the fruit of that seed. Any chance you can get the Hungry Jacks back up and running?”
Italian tourists concerned about a banking collapse have been assured they will have access to the Cash Bank of Balcatta so they can bring in garish amounts of cash with the peace of mind that Frank won’t take an eye off his lemon tree for more than a few seconds of the day.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?
