The Australian Defence Force has conceded that the recent show of military might in Lancelin backfired somewhat after a crack group of highly trained emus infiltrated their base.
A witness at the scene said he saw 3 emus with the missiles and launcher escaping on foot on Friday, adding,
“They’d clearly been waiting for this opportunity for some time, it was a highly planned operation and they executed it flawlessly, we really goofed up on this one who knows what they are planning with this kind of hardware”
At the time of publishing this article, the emus are believed to have taken control of the Wheatbelt Region.
An army insider said the development was concerning given how they once beat the Australian army with no munitions at all, adding,
“All efforts are being made to locate the missing gear but honestly I’d prefer to take this opportunity to pledge my allegiance to the new age of the Emu, glory be to our new emu overlords!”
While some may consider that cowardice he has a point. With another military insider telling us that once the emus learn how to load that bad boy it’s over for us. Adding,
“It won’t be long until they take out their first target – someone’s esky in an unguarded campsite, if you know emus you know they just love rummaging around trying to eat all your snacks, now they have the means to do it”
Lord help us all.
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