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Tuesday, March 10, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

    Mandurah develops space program after just 2 days without “certain websites”

    A mere 48 hours after big Wank decided to clamp down on Australia, Mandurah has announced it will be launching its first manned spaceship to…

    Belle March 10, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    New Freo Traffic Bridge fully completed after just 48 hours without “certain websites”

    A likely consequence of the Pornocalypse has been a major boost in the productivity of tradesman who are though to spend over half their day…

    Belle March 10, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Little shops selling cheap dodgy fuel & expensive American snacks pop up over night

    Little shops that seemingly only sell outrageously priced American snacks have pivoted into a new hustle after reading the room on the public’s fears over…

    Belle March 10, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Politics

    Roger Cook’s removalist truck expected in West Perth by 2030 after hitting Kwinana Freeway traffic

    Western Australian Premier Roger Cook has done what many SOR have dreamt of doing for years – escaping Kwinana. Citing the need to be closer…

    Belle March 9, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    Tom Hanks chose GWS match as he was searching for a deserted location for Cast Away 2

    Tom Hanks was spotted at the GWS v Hawthorn match yesterday much to the surprise of the handful of punters in attendance. However, it wasn’t…

    Belle March 8, 2026
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Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

Acts of “Bazball” decreed a treasonable offence by order of The King

Belle December 22, 2025

England have entered full damage control after the controversial style of aggressive test batting has been declared dead.  Thus to protect the sanctity of English…

View More Acts of “Bazball” decreed a treasonable offence by order of The King
Bell Tower Times From the Zoo

Top 11 worst people you’ll encounter at the pub this silly season

Belle December 21, 2025

The guy who thinks waving a pineapple is ballin’ – Woah, calm down Bill Gates, you wouldn’t want to start a stampede of every female bartender…

View More Top 11 worst people you’ll encounter at the pub this silly season
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

Australia to be replaced by Jake Paul at next Ashes to give England a chance at winning something 

Belle December 21, 2025

The ICC has made a ruling that Jake Paul will be replacing the Australian cricket team in all future Ashes games to give England a…

View More Australia to be replaced by Jake Paul at next Ashes to give England a chance at winning something 
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

WA holiday spots overwhelmed by rowdy Balinese tourists

Belle December 21, 2025 Down SouthUp North

As the Aussie dollar drops, Western Australian holiday hot spots are being inundated with rowdy Balinese tourists who have decided to give Australia a taste…

View More WA holiday spots overwhelmed by rowdy Balinese tourists
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS From the Zoo

Top 14 Signs You’re A Down South Pest

Belle December 20, 2025

Going down south is an important part of the Westralian spirit. Some are well behaved, most aren’t, get your bingo cards ready: 1. You ruin…

View More Top 14 Signs You’re A Down South Pest
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

Baldivis matriarch flexes on neighbours by bringing out a Viennetta after dinner party

Belle December 20, 2025

Belinda was sending a very clear message on Sunday night to the neighbours she invited around to a BBQ when she brought out an original…

View More Baldivis matriarch flexes on neighbours by bringing out a Viennetta after dinner party

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Mandurah develops space program after just 2 days without “certain websites”
  • New Freo Traffic Bridge fully completed after just 48 hours without “certain websites”
  • Little shops selling cheap dodgy fuel & expensive American snacks pop up over night
  • Roger Cook’s removalist truck expected in West Perth by 2030 after hitting Kwinana Freeway traffic
  • Tom Hanks chose GWS match as he was searching for a deserted location for Cast Away 2
  • Cott residents demand “Eco-Barrier” be moved to Stirling Highway to stop creatures reaching Sculptures by the Sea

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