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Thursday, March 12, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Perth Man Vows To Drive Himself Into Financial Ruin Before Taking Public Transport

    “No”, Jackson responded to his partner’s 15 minute impassioned plea to release some pressure from the family budget by relying on a little public transport…

    Belle March 11, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

    Man Ostracised From Caravan Park for Practising Reversing Before Arrival

    A Perth man has faced the full force of weekend warrior caravaner fury after he let slip to fellow holidaymakers that he’d actually practised reversing…

    Belle March 11, 2026
    View More
  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

    Mandurah develops space program after just 2 days without “certain websites”

    A mere 48 hours after big Wank decided to clamp down on Australia, Mandurah has announced it will be launching its first manned spaceship to…

    Belle March 10, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    New Freo Traffic Bridge fully completed after just 48 hours without “certain websites”

    A likely consequence of the Pornocalypse has been a major boost in the productivity of tradesman who are though to spend over half their day…

    Belle March 10, 2026
    View More
  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Little shops selling cheap dodgy fuel & expensive American snacks pop up over night

    Little shops that seemingly only sell outrageously priced American snacks have pivoted into a new hustle after reading the room on the public’s fears over…

    Belle March 10, 2026
    View More

Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Business

Alcoa to save millions on closing & scrapping Kwinana refinery by just leaving it unguarded over night 

Belle September 30, 2025

Alcoa has assured its shareholders that the process of closing and scrapping the Kwinana refinery will not be an economic burden to the company.  Typically,…

View More Alcoa to save millions on closing & scrapping Kwinana refinery by just leaving it unguarded over night 
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

Man throws himself to the mercy of returning down south traffic to unwind after a day at the Perth Royal Show

Belle September 29, 2025

A Perth man has decided he needs to enjoy a comparatively relaxing activity after enduring the horrors of the Perth Royal Show. His senses have…

View More Man throws himself to the mercy of returning down south traffic to unwind after a day at the Perth Royal Show
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

Geelong formally request an assistance package from the AFL

Belle September 28, 2025

Geelong claim more has to be done to even the playing field after being hammered six ways to Sunday at yesterday’s grand final.  Coach Scott…

View More Geelong formally request an assistance package from the AFL
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

Snoop reverts back to his 2012 Snoop Lion phase due to very recent events

Belle September 27, 2025

Snoop has been accused of bandwagoning after reverting back to his 2012 “Snoop Lion” phase that he adopted after a life changing trip to Jamaica. …

View More Snoop reverts back to his 2012 Snoop Lion phase due to very recent events
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Politics

Clive Palmer now preparing to sue the entire Planet after $300 Billion fail against Australia

Belle September 27, 2025

News broke today that an international arbitrary tribunal dismissed Clive’s $300 billion claim against Australia. Back in 2023, Titanic enthusiast Palmer sought a ruling from…

View More Clive Palmer now preparing to sue the entire Planet after $300 Billion fail against Australia
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

REPORT: the only thing a coffee shop rave shares with an actual rave is that a toilet is getting obliterated 

Belle September 27, 2025

When Gen Z aren’t sitting around thinking up new names to call old behaviours, they are throwing themselves into the faux-high-on-life world of coffee raves.…

View More REPORT: the only thing a coffee shop rave shares with an actual rave is that a toilet is getting obliterated 

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Perth Man Vows To Drive Himself Into Financial Ruin Before Taking Public Transport
  • Man Ostracised From Caravan Park for Practising Reversing Before Arrival
  • Mandurah develops space program after just 2 days without “certain websites”
  • New Freo Traffic Bridge fully completed after just 48 hours without “certain websites”
  • Little shops selling cheap dodgy fuel & expensive American snacks pop up over night
  • Roger Cook’s removalist truck expected in West Perth by 2030 after hitting Kwinana Freeway traffic

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