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The Bell Tower Times

The Bell Tower Times

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Wednesday, November 05, 2025
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Pilbara Man Establishes Dominance by Refusing to Shoo Flies from Face In Front of Perth Coworkers

    Being born in the Pilbara, Rory swallowed 3 whole flies before he’d even left his mother’s womb as an infant. Some say the additional protein…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre

    A local Perth tradesman who is thought to be responsible for over 1000 ruined tyres per month has finally admitted his patented carelessness with nails…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up

    A festival poster stuck to a fence has once again ruined an ageing millennials day as he did his best to recognise more than 1…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times Business Entertainment

    Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning

    A Perth bogan who found himself over refreshed and dangerously gee’d up has been counting his blessings while sitting in his piss soaked trousers at…

    Belle November 4, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 

    Authorities have put out an alert that it is highly likely you may fail a piss-test tomorrow if you were within a kilometre of the…

    Belle November 2, 2025
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WA Culture & Notable Events

Mrs Jacaranda Season

Belle November 2, 2020

For years, Jacinta has chased the purple dragon. When Spring rolls around she transforms from a mild-mannered art teacher to a ravenous fiend looking for…

View More Mrs Jacaranda Season
Unique & Other

The Office Shit-Talker

Belle November 1, 2020

If talking shit was an artform then Dan painted the Sistine Chapel in pure bull excrement. A benefit-of-the-doubt parasite that feeds off people’s natural tendency…

View More The Office Shit-Talker
Work & Study

The Amateur Model Photographer

Belle October 28, 2020 creepemploymentInstagram

Tom is the pile of crusty tissues next to the bed of amateur photography. A man with the personality of a discarded FHM magazine on…

View More The Amateur Model Photographer
Adventure World
Party & Entertainment

Mr Adventure World

Belle October 27, 2020 Bogan

Ken feels enough time has elapsed from an incident in 2018 for him to return to Adventure World for a day with the kids. He…

View More Mr Adventure World
Uncategorized

So, You’ve Forgotten how to Google it?

Belle October 17, 2020

In the Facebook kingdom, the seemingly innocent act of asking your peers for information has been invaded by two separate yet equally fucked species: the…

View More So, You’ve Forgotten how to Google it?
From the Zoo

IN FOCUS: Adidas Snap Pants

Belle October 17, 2020

They say you only truly enjoyed your Adidas snap pants for two days – the day you stole them and the day they protected your…

View More IN FOCUS: Adidas Snap Pants

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Pilbara Man Establishes Dominance by Refusing to Shoo Flies from Face In Front of Perth Coworkers
  • Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre
  • Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up
  • Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning
  • Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 
  • Royal Family tells loyal subjects that the most horrific punishment they could think of for Andrew was making him one of you

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  • Perth Driver Accused Of Being A Witch After Failing To Slam Brakes Upon Entering Tunnel
  • Leering Tradie Alleges He Was Catfished After Driver Of P-Plated Suzuki Swift Turned Out To Be Middle Aged Man
  • Crack team of Pilbara miners sent to UK to assure them their heatwave was nothing 
  • Moving down train carriage far too similar to merging for Perth to feel comfortable attempting
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