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The Bell Tower Times

The Bell Tower Times

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Thursday, November 06, 2025
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Pilbara Man Establishes Dominance by Refusing to Shoo Flies from Face In Front of Perth Coworkers

    Being born in the Pilbara, Rory swallowed 3 whole flies before he’d even left his mother’s womb as an infant. Some say the additional protein…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre

    A local Perth tradesman who is thought to be responsible for over 1000 ruined tyres per month has finally admitted his patented carelessness with nails…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up

    A festival poster stuck to a fence has once again ruined an ageing millennials day as he did his best to recognise more than 1…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times Business Entertainment

    Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning

    A Perth bogan who found himself over refreshed and dangerously gee’d up has been counting his blessings while sitting in his piss soaked trousers at…

    Belle November 4, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 

    Authorities have put out an alert that it is highly likely you may fail a piss-test tomorrow if you were within a kilometre of the…

    Belle November 2, 2025
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Perth & WA Locations

Mr East Freo

Belle September 15, 2020

Life truly began for John when he realised he had so much more potential than being a garden variety shitbloke. He had gorged himself at…

View More Mr East Freo
Perth & WA Locations

Mrs Butler

Belle September 13, 2020

Liz tells people she was named after the queen. In reality, she was named after the lorry that her father used to smuggle black market…

View More Mrs Butler
WA Culture & Notable Events

Mr Sizzler Salad Bar

Belle September 12, 2020 BoganFood

A 52nd birthday celebration for a 3rd generation Balcatta family means only one thing: a belt-unbuckling assault on the local Sizzler. Only kidding, there is…

View More Mr Sizzler Salad Bar
Party & Entertainment

Mr FIFO Foodie

Belle September 11, 2020 Food

For decades Kev only ever dined on frozen food like a culinary Eskimo but now, he is cashed up again and can afford a break…

View More Mr FIFO Foodie
Perth & WA Locations

Mr Down South

Belle September 7, 2020 DouthEntertainmentTravel

Adam is planning a trip Down South, but like an impotent male escort, he relies on toys to get people to come. His weekend warriors…

View More Mr Down South
WA Culture & Notable Events

Ms Father’s Day

Belle September 5, 2020 DadSlacktivist

Jessica wakes up and vomits violently all over her sheets. Not due to the ill-effects of an intoxicated stupor but rather due to it being…

View More Ms Father’s Day

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Pilbara Man Establishes Dominance by Refusing to Shoo Flies from Face In Front of Perth Coworkers
  • Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre
  • Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up
  • Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning
  • Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 
  • Royal Family tells loyal subjects that the most horrific punishment they could think of for Andrew was making him one of you

SUPPORT THE BTT

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  • Perth Driver Accused Of Being A Witch After Failing To Slam Brakes Upon Entering Tunnel
  • Leering Tradie Alleges He Was Catfished After Driver Of P-Plated Suzuki Swift Turned Out To Be Middle Aged Man
  • Crack team of Pilbara miners sent to UK to assure them their heatwave was nothing 
  • Moving down train carriage far too similar to merging for Perth to feel comfortable attempting
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