Craig knew his son Decklayn was a chip off the old block when he took out his first onerous loan to acquire a 2001 WRX the minute he got his licence. So one can only imagine the joy Craig felt when the son followed in his footpaths in the pursuit of love.
Looking back at old photos of his Skyline parked outside Maccas on Leach Highway, Craig told The Times,
“It’s a bit different ya know. High school kids are a bit older but it’s still cool as shit my boy is friend zoned by an 17 1/2 year old. My first friend zoning was with proper 17 year old. I was 23. She used me pretty hard to give her lifts but I everyone was jealous”
Decklayn found himself similarly being used for his wheels. We spoke to the high school student who told The Times,
“Yeah, I’m playing the long game with this loser. He drops me off at parties for the rest of the year and then I told him he can come to my year 12 ball next February. No chance that’s happening”
As part of the deal, Decklayn will have to chauffeur the student around Perth at her request. In return, she agreed to go on 1 car cruise so that Decklayn can prove he knows a real-life human female. Decklayn told The Times,
“Pretty stoked ay. Dad met mum when she was at high school and their marriage lasted a full 3 years. He even showed me how to do the Paul Walker stare & drive. Last time he done it he smashed through the neighbours brick fence ha ha ha”
A further sign that Decklayn hasn’t fallen far from the tree is he’s already had a very stern meeting with the girl’s parents and told in no uncertain times that he’s a fkn taxi and should he try anything he’ll be dealt with.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?
