REPORT: Perth Man In Arctic Jacket & Shorts Doesn’t Care What You Think 

Perth man, Jeremy knows you’re looking at him. He knows you’re murmuring under your breath that he’s an idiot. He also knows that he doesn’t give a shit about your opinion on his choice of winter wear. 

Looking noticeably warm up top and cold down the bottom, Jeremy told The Times,

“Yeah, I wear a $400 arctic grade jacket with my favourite pair of shorts. Sue me. Is that a crime all of a sudden? I can’t handle long pants and if you can’t handle that then get farked”

Jeremy, like many Perth locals, claims that his pins don’t feel the cold and unless it’s a non-Bali wedding or court you can catch him in pants when he’s 6ft deep, mate.

A witness on Beaufort Street saw Jeremy parading his relatively tanned legs around The Queens with great pride. He told The Times,

“That was a man who well and truly couldn’t care less about conventional winter fashion norms. He was sure to pull off quite a few cheeky calf raises at the bar. All the while his jacket was zipped up right to his chops”

A friend of Jeremy favours long pants in winter and claims his mate is just being “ridiculously stubborn”, adding,

“He just keeps saying Perth doesn’t have winters. This is despite the fact the jacket he never takes off is graded for like negative 15 degrees. It’s obvious he thinks that if he wears long pants he’s lost or something. He’s a clown mate”

Jeremy has vowed to continue to wear the odd combination no matter how many people take sneaky snapchats of his ensembles and send them to their mates to laugh at. 

In fact, the man seems intent on pushing the envelope even further. Today he swapped his shoes for thongs and showcased the ultimate in summer/winter fusion. He told The Times,

“All my body temperature is lost through my chest. Got it? I’m not cold. Not even a little bit, What Winter??? What farken winter mate???”

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?