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The Bell Tower Times

The Bell Tower Times

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Monday, November 17, 2025
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    Starvin’ Scott Boland refuses to turn right at Claremont Hungry Jack’s, let’s traffic flow

    After a full day of helping old ladies cross the road and helping bloke’s move house, all Scotty Boland wanted was a cheeky feed to…

    Belle November 17, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

    Australia warned to not let England’s home ground advantage rattle them in the first Ashes test in Perth

    The Australian cricket team will be coming in hot to Western Australia aka Not-so-little-England and they should expect a hostile crowd.  In fact, WA now…

    Belle November 17, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    REPORT: Perth UFC fan must be excited for tomorrow’s event because he hasn’t slept since last Tuesday

    Surely Perth UFC fan, Brayden, is excited for tomorrow’s big clash given he hasn’t managed a single week of sleep since last Tuesday. His haters,…

    Belle November 15, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

    Border Force opens first Indonesian BCF to help illegal fishers adapt to life as WA boat owners

    A special investigation by The Times has revealed Australian Border Force is operating Indonesia’s first BCF store on Rote Island to help the beneficiaries of…

    Belle November 15, 2025
    View More
  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Local Council fines Andrew Lloyd Webber after his CATS cast found roaming Perth park

    West End musical titan Andrew Lloyd Webber has run afoul of local Council regulations after bringing his CATS show to Perth. It seems his unregistered…

    Belle November 14, 2025
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Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Technology & Finance

Australia to roll out pirated copies of Windows XP after global tech outage 

Belle July 20, 2024

Australia has vowed to protect its citizens against all future global outages by making pirated copies of the GOAT Windows XP available to all citizens…

View More Australia to roll out pirated copies of Windows XP after global tech outage 
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS From the Zoo

A day in the life of a Grey Nomad 

Belle July 19, 2024 A Day In The Life Of

6:00 am: the early bird gets the worm and I’m up to launch a final raid on the caravan park’s ablution block. I stuff my…

View More A day in the life of a Grey Nomad 
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

AFL promises Flagmantle 8 business class sinks to piss in to even playing field 

Belle July 18, 2024

The AFL has responded to the furore over the Flagmantle chartered flight that saw players need to urinate into the sink due to a lack…

View More AFL promises Flagmantle 8 business class sinks to piss in to even playing field 
BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

Marriage On The Rocks After Wife Tries To Throw Out Antique 90’s Midori Illusion Shaker

Belle July 17, 2024

For over 20 years of married life, Brett’s antique mid 90’s Midori Illusion shaker lived happily in the back of the second row of the…

View More Marriage On The Rocks After Wife Tries To Throw Out Antique 90’s Midori Illusion Shaker
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Business

ex-BASE jumper now entering building contracts in WA to satisfy his risk-taking tendencies

Belle July 17, 2024

A former BASE jumper and all-around lunatic has revealed that throwing himself off buildings, antennae, bridges and cliffs no longer gives him the thrill it…

View More ex-BASE jumper now entering building contracts in WA to satisfy his risk-taking tendencies
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS From the Zoo

A Day In The Life Of A Law Graduate 

Belle July 17, 2024 A Day In The Life Of

6:30 am – crywank in the shower until I am sufficiently purged of all bodily fluids that will get in my way today. I am an…

View More A Day In The Life Of A Law Graduate 

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Starvin’ Scott Boland refuses to turn right at Claremont Hungry Jack’s, let’s traffic flow
  • Australia warned to not let England’s home ground advantage rattle them in the first Ashes test in Perth
  • REPORT: Perth UFC fan must be excited for tomorrow’s event because he hasn’t slept since last Tuesday
  • Border Force opens first Indonesian BCF to help illegal fishers adapt to life as WA boat owners
  • Local Council fines Andrew Lloyd Webber after his CATS cast found roaming Perth park
  • TransPerth commuter suspicious over escalator in perfect working order

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