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The Bell Tower Times

The Bell Tower Times

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Wednesday, November 05, 2025
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Pilbara Man Establishes Dominance by Refusing to Shoo Flies from Face In Front of Perth Coworkers

    Being born in the Pilbara, Rory swallowed 3 whole flies before he’d even left his mother’s womb as an infant. Some say the additional protein…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre

    A local Perth tradesman who is thought to be responsible for over 1000 ruined tyres per month has finally admitted his patented carelessness with nails…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up

    A festival poster stuck to a fence has once again ruined an ageing millennials day as he did his best to recognise more than 1…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times Business Entertainment

    Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning

    A Perth bogan who found himself over refreshed and dangerously gee’d up has been counting his blessings while sitting in his piss soaked trousers at…

    Belle November 4, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 

    Authorities have put out an alert that it is highly likely you may fail a piss-test tomorrow if you were within a kilometre of the…

    Belle November 2, 2025
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From the Zoo

6 Hot Tips For Being The Biggest Road Trip Pest You Can Be

Belle November 25, 2022

Navigating like an oxygen thief – heavy is the hand that controls the GPS. If you don’t have a firm grasp on the technology or can’t…

View More 6 Hot Tips For Being The Biggest Road Trip Pest You Can Be
BREAKING NEWS

REPORT: WA woman enjoying the “how the fark did they get my email day” sales

Belle November 25, 2022

Carla isn’t the type of consumer to look a gift horse in the mouth and she couldn’t be more stoked at the unsolicited emails from…

View More REPORT: WA woman enjoying the “how the fark did they get my email day” sales
BREAKING NEWS

Brutal scenes as substitute PE teacher attempts to drop some youthful lingo 

Belle November 24, 2022

A 27-year-old substitute PE Teacher erroneously believed he had the requisite youth-appeal to step up his communication game with his zoomer class today. A belief…

View More Brutal scenes as substitute PE teacher attempts to drop some youthful lingo 
BREAKING NEWS Technology & Finance

WA man kept awake at night pondering what new object he can whack a motor onto

Belle November 24, 2022

The last time Darron got a full night’s rest was 3 years ago after he successfully built a motorised esky. It was a challenging yet…

View More WA man kept awake at night pondering what new object he can whack a motor onto
BREAKING NEWS

Western Power proud of power grid for cacking its dacks on one isolated 34 degree day

Belle November 23, 2022

Western Power is now 100% sure the grid is going to “do its thing”  this summer after a truly impressive display yesterday leaving 7000 homes without power…

View More Western Power proud of power grid for cacking its dacks on one isolated 34 degree day
BREAKING NEWS Local

City of Belmont demands Rivervale be stripped of its unique postcode to take it down a peg

Belle November 22, 2022

The City of Belmont is concerned that Rivervale thinks it’s better than the rest of the suburbs comprising the Local Government Area due in no…

View More City of Belmont demands Rivervale be stripped of its unique postcode to take it down a peg

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Pilbara Man Establishes Dominance by Refusing to Shoo Flies from Face In Front of Perth Coworkers
  • Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre
  • Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up
  • Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning
  • Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 
  • Royal Family tells loyal subjects that the most horrific punishment they could think of for Andrew was making him one of you

SUPPORT THE BTT

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  • Perth Driver Accused Of Being A Witch After Failing To Slam Brakes Upon Entering Tunnel
  • Leering Tradie Alleges He Was Catfished After Driver Of P-Plated Suzuki Swift Turned Out To Be Middle Aged Man
  • Crack team of Pilbara miners sent to UK to assure them their heatwave was nothing 
  • Moving down train carriage far too similar to merging for Perth to feel comfortable attempting
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