Inner north woman’s credentials queried after failing to spend Sundays queuing for a bagel

An inner north 27 year old has shocked her community by bucking the trend and not joining the hordes of activewear-clad boiled bread seekers on Beaufort Street on Sunday mornings. Despite looking exactly like the type to do just that. 

Experts are trying to determine when Marie hasn’t developed bagel fever and why she thinks she’s better than everyone else. Some even go as far as to accuse the young lady of valuing her time a bit too much. We spoke to a Mount Lawley resident who told The Times,

“I got suspicious when she walked straight past the bagel shop. Didn’t even stop to have a peek at why so many people were milling around. I approached her and asked her if she had some allergies to bread. She shook her head and continued on with her day. How about that hey?”

This concerned member of the public decided to follow the lady to make sure she was at LEAST going to join a queue at Mary St or Chu Bakeries. She did not. Which only served to trouble this member of the public more. They continued,

“What! Who is this person? Marching to the beat of their own drum makes me absolutely sick. We have standards for young to mid-millennials in the inner North”

Luckily, the young lady was just on a bit more of a walk than usual and eventually joined a queue for a conti roll later that morning. Needless to say, the universe made sense again. 

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