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Wednesday, May 14, 2025
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Tradie Unrepentant About Right Hand Turn into Claremont Hungry Jacks

    “Couldn’t give a fark, mate”, Trevon barked as he shoved his 2nd Bacon Deluxe Burger into his face after a somewhat controversial decision to hold…

    Belle May 13, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

    Congestion on regional roads solved after “overtaking lane ahead” signs placed every 100m

    Main Roads WA have been praised for their genius initiative to ensure grey nomads towing caravans don’t clog up regional roads anymore.  The solution? To…

    Belle May 13, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Business

    Bunnings crushes local footy club’s sausage sizzle after hearing they were making a profit

    Bunnings good guy reputation hangs in tatters after a damning Four Corners report aired the other night.  In the report, the hardware giant was accused…

    Belle May 13, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

    Passengers On Road Trip Urge Driver To Slow Down On The Cheese Sausages

    “Jesus effin’ christ man, can this dude have a Yakult or something?”, a desperate plea from a passenger stuck in the back of Clint’s 4WD on…

    Belle May 12, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Business

    Woolworths announces it’s slashing prices on items it has already heavily marked up!

    Woolworths has just spent big on a media PR campaign to test just how gullible the consumer population is when it comes to their supposed…

    Belle May 12, 2025
    View More

BREAKING NEWS Featured

Perth’s Urban Sprawl Claims Credit For Lack of COVID Spread

Belle December 28, 2021 WA Culture

In an unprecedented move, Perth’s Urban Sprawl has stepped up to take the lion’s share of credit for WA recording another donut day of ‘Rona…

View More Perth’s Urban Sprawl Claims Credit For Lack of COVID Spread
BREAKING NEWS Featured

Perth Cup Patrons Promise To Practice Social Distancing When Passing On Each Other Covered In Bodily Fluids

Belle December 27, 2021

Perth Cup revellers are taking their COVID safe obligations seriously after finding out their day at the races will go ahead for vaxxed punters despite…

View More Perth Cup Patrons Promise To Practice Social Distancing When Passing On Each Other Covered In Bodily Fluids
Featured WA Culture & Notable Events

Mr ‘Why Haven’t My Bins Been Emptied???’

Belle December 27, 2021

For decades, Ron has maintained relative peace with his Council overlords based on the understanding they pick up his shit on the designated day and…

View More Mr ‘Why Haven’t My Bins Been Emptied???’
WA Culture & Notable Events Featured

Mr Perth Heatwave

Belle December 26, 2021 tradieWeather

Daryl is an unflushed toilet bowl of a man: full of shit and stained with the unpalatable skiddie of one-upmanship. The recent heat has sent…

View More Mr Perth Heatwave
Reckons Featured

So, You’re Becoming a Face Mask Entrepreneur?

Belle December 23, 2021

News of restrictions hit people differently. Some are compelled to descend upon their local shopping centres like itchy-arsed zombies seeking 180 rolls of toilet paper.…

View More So, You’re Becoming a Face Mask Entrepreneur?
BREAKING NEWS Featured

Perth Family’s Pipin’ Hot Roast Lunch Tradition Lives On Despite 42 Degree X-Mas Forecast

Belle December 22, 2021 WA Culture

No changes will be made to the Stirling family’s X-Mas menu despite the spicy temperatures expected on the day. When hell has opened up and…

View More Perth Family’s Pipin’ Hot Roast Lunch Tradition Lives On Despite 42 Degree X-Mas Forecast

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Tradie Unrepentant About Right Hand Turn into Claremont Hungry Jacks
  • Congestion on regional roads solved after “overtaking lane ahead” signs placed every 100m
  • Bunnings crushes local footy club’s sausage sizzle after hearing they were making a profit
  • Passengers On Road Trip Urge Driver To Slow Down On The Cheese Sausages
  • Woolworths announces it’s slashing prices on items it has already heavily marked up!
  • WA man trades in future prospects in dating pool for an obnoxious yank tank

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