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Thursday, March 19, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Politics

    Trump denies desperation after begging Perth to send floating party cube to Strait of Hormuz

    The Trumpinator 2000 is on a mission to sow chaos across the globe and is demanding his allies help chip in to a war they…

    Belle March 19, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Business

    Coles and Woolworths thank petrol companies for taking the heat off them

    Coles and Woolworths have each sent a thankyou hamper of marked down treats to the major petrol companies for managing to keep their own despicable…

    Belle March 18, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Business

    Government permits Woodside to pump crude oil directly into motorists’ tanks to alleviate cost pressure

    Forget high sulphur fuel, the salvation Aussie motorists need from the fuel crisis is coming from WA’s own Woodside who have long sought to cut…

    Belle March 17, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    St Paddy’s Day sees statewide shortage of traffic controllers in WA

    The WA construction industry has ground to a halt today after thousands of traffic controllers mysteriously called in sick on St Paddy’s Day. It is…

    Belle March 17, 2026
    View More
  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Politics

    Australians allowed early access to super to afford Easter

    The Albanese Government has rolled out a range of measures to combat the ever-burgeoning cost of living allegedly caused by the Iran war. Punters will…

    Belle March 17, 2026
    View More

BREAKING NEWS Featured

Bunnings Considering “Trolley Licences” After Hectic Aisle Rage Incident In Perth

Belle September 12, 2021

Bunnings has conceded that setting the general public loose in their stores with heavy, clunky trollies was a regrettable mistake. A mistake they know has…

View More Bunnings Considering “Trolley Licences” After Hectic Aisle Rage Incident In Perth
Featured Reckons

5 Ways to Ensure Your Wine Tour is #Blessed

Belle September 12, 2021 Drugs & AlcoholEntertainmentParty

Fashion  – to separate yourself from the uncouth tiara-wearing Kath & Kim kents in stretch Hummers, one must always wear a felt brimmed hat. Furthermore,…

View More 5 Ways to Ensure Your Wine Tour is #Blessed
BREAKING NEWS Featured

Parmi/Parma Disagreement Tearing Perth Mate’s Friendship Apart

Belle September 10, 2021

Brett and Taylor had enjoyed a most amicable friendship for almost a decade. However, there was an ever-present simmering resentment that was slowly breaking down…

View More Parmi/Parma Disagreement Tearing Perth Mate’s Friendship Apart
BREAKING NEWS Featured

Qantas to Scalp GF Tickets for Thrice the Price – “It wouldn’t feel like a grand final if we didn’t rip off West Aussies”

Belle September 9, 2021

Qantas executives have been unable to sleep since the AFL announced the 2021 Grand Final would be played in Perth this year.  Ripping off West…

View More Qantas to Scalp GF Tickets for Thrice the Price – “It wouldn’t feel like a grand final if we didn’t rip off West Aussies”
BREAKING NEWS Featured

“Trees are a hoax” – Clive to Launch HC Challenge to Force WA to Continue Logging Native Forests

Belle September 9, 2021

Sources from within the Palmer camp say the rotund litigation pest was livid that WA dared to create policy without first checking with him.  In…

View More “Trees are a hoax” – Clive to Launch HC Challenge to Force WA to Continue Logging Native Forests
BREAKING NEWS Featured

AFL Backtrack on Cancelling Grand Final Parade After Seeing NORTHBRIDGE Sign

Belle September 7, 2021

Perth was shocked to hear that the AFL had ruled against staging a Grand Final parade in Perth due to terminal butthurt-itis, “terrorism” concerns, and…

View More AFL Backtrack on Cancelling Grand Final Parade After Seeing NORTHBRIDGE Sign

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Trump denies desperation after begging Perth to send floating party cube to Strait of Hormuz
  • Coles and Woolworths thank petrol companies for taking the heat off them
  • Government permits Woodside to pump crude oil directly into motorists’ tanks to alleviate cost pressure
  • St Paddy’s Day sees statewide shortage of traffic controllers in WA
  • Australians allowed early access to super to afford Easter
  • BREAKING: Perth man nails beach conditions after demonstrating basic ability to read wind forecast

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