It reportedly panic stations at Rio Tinto today when the mining company heard the news of a large capsule-esque mystery object had washed up on Green Head in WA’s Mid West coast.
The company’s first thought was “shit, not one of ours is it?” This was compounded by another question “It’s not radioactive as well is it?” Followed by, “Jesus, please not again”.
To answer the questions the company reached out to WA Police. A source close to Rio told The Times,
“Yeah, Rio called up the WA Police and asked them to do it a solid and just run a cheeky Geigerino over the hunk of shit. If it beeps rapidly there’s a good chance it’s one of theirs. Probably fell off the back of a ship or the like”
Police allegedly told the company that they’d get onto it but would be “pretty pissed off” if this was another classic Rio snafu. A spokesperson for the police told The Times,
“We’d like to assure the public that Rio guaranteed us that if it was one of them it would only be a ¼ to ½ the strength of a piece of graphite on the roof of the Chernobyl reactor. So you know, not bad, not good”
It’s too early to ascertain what the mystery object is but clearly, the state is keen to tick Rio off the subject list as soon as possible given its penchant for losing radioactive items. Like they did earlier this year.
RELATED: Mystery object already on bricks and stripped for parts after washing up on WA’s Mid West coast || Radioactive Capsule Located After Landcruiser Goes Back To The Future Trying To Block Overtaking Lane
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?