England vehemently deny that the reason it’s not coming home is because they choked against Argentina. Or any other of their World Cup crash outs.
Instead, England has pointed their finger at the UK and the tougher border controls that have been implemented since BREXIT for footballs in ability to come home.
We spoke to an English soccer expert who said the new passport system is a mess for dual-citizens like football, adding,
“Unfortunately, football left England a long time ago and it’s really a citizen of the world now, which as you know, BREXIT geezers absolutely hate, so yeah it’s no surprise it’s having a hard time coming home”
According to UK border authorities, football is free to come home if it meets entry requirements and presents the valid documents. Adding,
“We have information that football isn’t English anymore and we take that kinda thing seriously. Why’s football spending so much time in Brazil, Germany, Italy and France? It’s not acting very English if you ask us”
You have to hand it to the English, this is one of their finest copes.