Local dirtbag ending the year as a somebody thanks to the magic of a rooftop bar

A local Perth woman who is described as a “dirtbag” by most people who know her well is choosing to ditch that title for the night and go out like a star on a rooftop bar.

In 2023, Celeste was mostly known by her peers as the kind of friend that always owed you money, flirted with your partner and would throw her own mother under the bus for a bar card at Fitzy’s in Bunbury.

However, in just 6 short hours, Celeste will be a real “somebody” as she sees out the year in style. She told The Times,

“Everyone is capable of change and I think this rooftop bar I managed to con my way into proves that. I told Alice that I’d pay her back next year for the ticket. she probably thinks I mean tomorrow but I mean at least August”

What a classic Celeste move – the kind of low life that would be better off lining up outside a Northbridge club. Alas, she’s living it up now and everyone is impressed.

We spoke to Aaron who dated Celeste until she got sick of the handbag he bought him. He told The Times,

“I have to say, I didn’t really want Celeste to come tonight but seeing her pose over the railing with a cocktail made me realise that people can change. She isn’t the girl that took all my groceries & dog with her when I kicked her out, she was like a celebrity or something”

You work it Celeste. You work it.

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?

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