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Friday, April 03, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Police called to Perth Maccas after man explains his 5 Fillet-O-Fish order has nothing to do with Good Friday

    A Perth McDonalds has been left scrambling for answers today after a man boldly entered the store and ordered 5 Fillet-O-Fish burgers without even a…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Local Seagulls Thank Catholic Guilt As They Prepare For Their Biggest Day Of The Year

    Good Friday is the official seagull grand final with over 500% more fish & chip munching families to terrorise in their endless pursuit for a…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Local mum reconsiders catholic guilt as cost-of-living means ol mate Cap’n Birds Eye is coming for lunch

    Local mum Patricia has seriously questioned her annual display of faith after realising that the weekend budget doesn’t allow for the frills of bougie fish…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Politics

    WA to Invoke Emergency Powers to Divert Froffs to Those Who Forgot to Stock Up Before Good Friday

    Roger Cook has called a special press conference to announce WA will be invoking emergency powers to stop the indignity of the Good Friday booze…

    Belle April 2, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    NASA Reveals Artemis Program Aims to Establish New Perth Suburb on Moon

    Plans for the latest Perth suburb in the ever-expansive sprawl have moved one step closer after the successful launch of the Orion as part of…

    Belle April 2, 2026
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BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

Emergency Rations Of Antihistamines En Route To Perth Cup To Combat All The Sniffing Going On

Belle January 1, 2023

Authorities have been left baffled by the “severe sniff fest” going on at Perth Cup and fear that there may be an outbreak of some…

View More Emergency Rations Of Antihistamines En Route To Perth Cup To Combat All The Sniffing Going On
Lifestyle, Love & Parenting Featured

Ms “New Year, New Me”

Belle January 1, 2023 HealthNew AgeParty

Natharsha’s 2023 is off to a flying start. She has already lost 5kg from her pinga-fest and even woke up with her arms wrapped around…

View More Ms “New Year, New Me”
From the Zoo

IN FOCUS: Girls Who Order “Expresso” Martinis

Belle December 31, 2022

It’s ladies night, and like Amazonian dick fish, the group of 10s follow the stream of happy hour piss until they invasively enter the bar…

View More IN FOCUS: Girls Who Order “Expresso” Martinis
Party & Entertainment

Ms New Year’s Eve

Belle December 31, 2022

Mel is the Chris Angel of New Years Eve revellers. She wears far too much make-up and the entire night is just a carefully orchestrated…

View More Ms New Year’s Eve
BREAKING NEWS

The BTT’s Year In Review PART 2

Belle December 30, 2022

WA farewells an icon (July) – WA’s favourite pachyderm finally called stumps on a fantastic innings. Tricia lived to 65 years of age and never…

View More The BTT’s Year In Review PART 2
Featured From the Zoo

6 New Year’s Resolutions For Western Australians 

Belle December 29, 2022

Learn how to reverse park seeing as you insist on doing so – we get it. Your fourby has special needs and you’ve become a…

View More 6 New Year’s Resolutions For Western Australians 

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Police called to Perth Maccas after man explains his 5 Fillet-O-Fish order has nothing to do with Good Friday
  • Local Seagulls Thank Catholic Guilt As They Prepare For Their Biggest Day Of The Year
  • Local mum reconsiders catholic guilt as cost-of-living means ol mate Cap’n Birds Eye is coming for lunch
  • WA to Invoke Emergency Powers to Divert Froffs to Those Who Forgot to Stock Up Before Good Friday
  • NASA Reveals Artemis Program Aims to Establish New Perth Suburb on Moon
  • Albanese Expected to Remind Nation West Coast Are Back in Tonight’s Address

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