In an open letter to the Fremantle Doctor, the people of Perth have urged the iconic sea breeze to dig deep and give 110% for the boys.
Sadly, the Sea Breeze has been unable to do much against the soaring temperatures in Perth over the last couple of days. Some reporting that the breeze actually increases the temperature.
We spoke to one of the Doctor’s biggest fans who said he knew it had what it takes to save the day. Adding,
“Not sure what has gotten into the Doc recently but it’s putting in piss poor effort after piss poor effort. I’m sweating like a disgusting wheel of cheese here mate but I have faith in it, she’ll come good mate, I can feel it”
Another sea breeze fan and notorious airconditioning stinge said he was “really” hoping the sea breeze would pick up its game later this arvo. Adding,
“You got any idea how much that air con costs me a day to run? Too much. I just tell the kids to stfu and wait for the breeze to come in and they can crack a window. So it better not make a fool out of me”
Weather experts are less confident and warn Perth that they shouldn’t expect too much relief from the doctor. One expert told The Times,
“The heat is just too extreme. Any mild relief will soon be overpowered by the baking sun anyway. Sorry Perth, you’ll have to deal with these stinkers by yourself for a bit”
There you have it Perth. You might be better off finding yourself a pool to submerge yourself in for the next 48 hours.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?