Toadie eyeing off retirement in Perf where he can accidentally send it into the river instead

With Neighbours finally winding up, Toadfish Rebecchi is finally free to spread his wings and join a community where accidentally driving into bodies of water is just another day’s work. 

Word on the street is that the WA Government wooed him after being impressed with the sheer air he got after flying into the ocean in his VC Commodore wagon. 

A spokesperson for the WA Government told The Times,

“We think Toadie has the exact kind of driving skills to fit in around Perth. He’ll even get to pick up tips and tricks from a variety of motorists who have gone in the drink. Perhaps even get some inspiration from the front-of-your-house-crashing community”

We understand that Toadie will be assessing his options but should he choose Perth, there would be no shortage of women wanting to go on a post-wedding vehicular dip with the soap star. 

We spoke to a Toadie groupie who said her dream wedding was on the Matilda Bay foreshore. A spot close to one of Perth’s premier locations to send it into the river. She told The Times,

“I’m just a sucker for a lawyer with a goatee. I’ve never seen a man encompass the total look of the Midland Magistrate’s court with such style. Oh and the boy can drive!”

Unfortunately, a VC Commodore wagon may be hard to come across these days but a local Toyota dealer has gladly offered to get Toadie into his first Hilux. Arguably a finer vehicle to express his desire to get wet. 

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?