Rodney delivered the first stage of his family’s budget cuts this morning by smashing the second air-con remote against a wall in a cost-of-living-induced rage.
The second stage of Rodney’s “tough” budget was to tell his family that the big Xmas pressie this year will be a single hour of uninterrupted air conditioning at a “generous” 24 degrees. He’s described the gift as “really pushing the boat out”, adding
“Yeah, that Fujitsu hunk of shit won’t be seeing the light of day this summer. Last year the big Xmas pressie was a family trip to Broome. This year it’s an hour of aircon at 24 degrees. I wanted to make it 26 but the wife told me she’d leave me and tell the kids I went to the shops and never came back”
Needless to say, the news was met with tears of joy. It’s only October but the kids are unable to sleep like it was X-Mas eve itself. Rodney’s wife told The Times,
“A whole hour of air conditioning. What a treat. It is going to be the best X-Mas ever. We know families who have just decided to tear their units off the wall so we are quite blessed”
Rodney has, of course, failed to mention that this little hour of power is going to be off-peak. Adding,
“Who am I? Bill Gates? On peak hour of air conditioning in this economy? Get farked. It will be a nice, pleasant midnight hour of power for the whole family to enjoy”
In addition to his two-pronged budget plan to tackle the rising cost of living, Rodney has looked into whether adding a 3rd layer of brick to his house would help.
He has also contacted his plumbing mate to seek advice on whether he could hook his aircon up to his gas supply. Could just work. At this rate, a Grange-powered generator might be cheaper.