A Down South cellar door has been left in total shock after a lady who arrived via a party bus respectfully inquired about the tasting notes she detected after taking a civilised sip of a Chardonnay.
Prior to this curveball, the cellar door had been inundated with some of the finest displays of human trash behaviour on offer.
Western suburb elitists clicking their fingers, bogans barking about the volume of tasting in their glass, and of course, the soothing sounds of party goers shrieking like a corella on bath salts.
A staff member at the cellar door told The Times,
“I had just gone to my happy place, you know. Most people coming through are just trying to get buzzed and if we’re lucky they will make some token effort to sound like they appreciate the wine. Not that they ever buy a bottle”
Indeed, the systemic ritual of tasting every white and then every red is alive and well in the South West. She continued,
“Then this woman from another wine bus approached. Steady on her feet and asked to taste a Chardonnay that I feel would pair well with a fish covered in a dill & butter sauce. I didn’t really know how to act, someone from a wine bus was talking to me like a human being and in a normal range of decibels”
Witnesses couldn’t believe their ears as the wine tour member didn’t quaff the tasting in one go and took time to saviour the grapey goodness around her palate. The staff member continued,
“I can taste that lemon zest coming through nicely, with the oak taking a back seat. Great suggestion I’ll take 6”
The staff member was lost for words. Even though the line for tastings was stacking up she was frozen in hospo bliss. To the point where another staff member had to step in to get the line moving again.
Luckily, a less couth member of her entourage snorted out some ignorant nothings to break the eerie silence, “I hope it goes well with some surfer dick cos that’s what I’ll be eating tonight, sis”
Just like that, the weird aura of respect between the wine taster and cellar door had been broken and it was business as usual.
Truly anything is possible over Easter.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?