Albo promises WA a sweet GST deal if we can organise him a sik bucks party cruise on the Swan

Newly engaged Anthony Albanese has promised WA a fair deal on GST provided we can do him a solid and arrange the bucks party of a lifetime – WA style.

Labor insiders say that before he gets the matrimonial ball & chain attached to his leg he wants to follow in the fine tradition of many a drunk WA bogan and hit a booze cruise before ending up at the nasties in Northbridge later on.

A source told The Times,

“Is it really a bucks do in Perth unless you vomit off a boat on the mighty Swan River while trying to convince a stripper that you can save her?”

Sources close to Roger Cook say the Premier has been busy all week making arrangements for the best bucks party cruise money can buy. A source added,

“When you look at the enormous amount of GST we stand to receive a few grand on a bucks party doesn’t seem like much. Unfortunately, Twiggy won’t stop interfering and is insisting on a banana show but Roger doesn’t think Albo is that kinda bloke”

Indeed, newly single himself, Twiggy is no stranger to partying. He also wants to get Albo liquored up and run a few plans past him.

It wouldn’t be politics without some controversy though. With aspirational WA Libs leader Baz telling the PM that he could organise a bucks that would run rings around Cooks.

As a staple of the 90s club scene, no doubt that would be true and Albo has said he doesn’t care which political party gets it over the line, he will deliver a fair GST deal to whoever can get him VIP entry to Voodoo later in the night.

The race is truly on and WA can only benefit.

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?