When one watched the first session of the Ashes last night something was very clear. England’s Bazball is a scourge and must be cleansed by the Australian team. “How?” will be the question on everyone’s lips but one Perth identity thinks he has the answer.
“Fighting fire with fire” a source close to Supreme Lord Mayor Basil told The Times. Adding,
“Our Honour Supreme Lord Mayor of Perth was watching the broadcast and couldn’t help to notice a complete lack of Baz in it. Could this be the secret? Defeating Bazball with our own Bazball?”
According to source, Baz has sent a proposal to the Australian cricket team outlining a few changes that would see the boys lift and get the job done against the English with ease. The source added,
“First and foremost Baz on every commentary team. That’s a given. Next, oval side interviews with Baz and a dedicated 24/7 Baznalysis team using all the latest technology to measure how much more Baz is needed to sway the odds in Australia’s favour. It worked for the Olympics”
Baz also suggests setting the field like it was the Perth CBD. The source continued,
“It’s an easy comparison as there are about as many people in the Perth CBD each day as a cricket side. The key is creating a very boring yet menacing environment. That’s how you get people out”
Other ideas include a highly trained team of Aussie cricket fans like the Richies but rebranded as the Bazzies. Just a lot of Basil. All innings, every innings.
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