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The Bell Tower Times

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Sunday, July 06, 2025
The Bell Tower Times
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Category: BREAKING NEWS

Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS True-ish Crime

SPECIAL INVESTIGATION: The Gangs Of Peppermint Grove

Belle September 6, 2023 Golden Triangle

It was late on a Tuesday evening when we got the tip-off. A man walking his Cavoodle was accosted by 5 youths in distinctive, matching…

View More SPECIAL INVESTIGATION: The Gangs Of Peppermint Grove
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Business

Cartel offer Alan Joyce a job after hearing his reputation for sending bags to every corner of the globe

Belle September 5, 2023

An unexpected job offer has come Alan Joyce’s way from Sinaola in Mexico after the Cartel heard the CEO would be stepping down from his…

View More Cartel offer Alan Joyce a job after hearing his reputation for sending bags to every corner of the globe
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Business

Alan Joyce resigns 2 months early, reinforcing Qantas’ commitment to never departing on schedule

Belle September 5, 2023

In true Qantas fashion, Alan Joyce departed at a time that was not scheduled. This time, it was an aggressively early departure which is both…

View More Alan Joyce resigns 2 months early, reinforcing Qantas’ commitment to never departing on schedule
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

Misunderstood Perth Storm Just Wanted To Ensure You Were Up Bright & Early For Father’s Day

Belle September 3, 2023

Sections of the community are calling for an inquest into the absolute racket the Great Perth Storm was making last night and well into the…

View More Misunderstood Perth Storm Just Wanted To Ensure You Were Up Bright & Early For Father’s Day
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS From the Zoo

OPINION: Get the fark out of my way!

Belle September 2, 2023

G’day shitfabrains, Robbo here, got a wild idea for youse lot, get the fark out of my way when I’m driving on the road! Or…

View More OPINION: Get the fark out of my way!
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS From the Zoo

9 Exciting Ways To Spend A Rainy Day In Perth

Belle September 2, 2023 WA Culture

Go swimming in a surprise pool – surprise pools is one thing Perth does exceptionally well. Thanks to the ridiculously shit drainage across the city,…

View More 9 Exciting Ways To Spend A Rainy Day In Perth

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TRENDING NEWS

  • REPORT: Labubu is just Teletubbies for people who @ brands on IG pretending they have an endorsement
  • Birkenstock urgently recall these things. No specific reason they’re just sorry for releasing them
  • Qantas hackers now the custodians of millions of useless flight credits
  • Crack team of Pilbara miners sent to UK to assure them their heatwave was nothing 
  • Freo Dockers have been training in a Wagin sheep paddock in preparation for the SCG turf
  • Eradication back on the cards after the Cuntbeetle was found to have jumped the queue for Rotto accommodation

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  • Crack team of Pilbara miners sent to UK to assure them their heatwave was nothing 
  • Moving down train carriage far too similar to merging for Perth to feel comfortable attempting
  • BoM To Reclassify Perth Storms Based On Likelihood Of Trampoline Blowing Away 
  • REPORT: Perth Man In Arctic Jacket & Shorts Doesn’t Care What You Think 
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