In an absurd escalation, Australia’s own Trumpian blowhard, Clive Palmer, has pledged the services of the mighty Titanic II towards the US blockade of the Strait of Hormuz.
We note that Palmer was only able to pledge and not actually send the mighty vessel on account of the fact he never actually got around to building it. Just another weird pipe dream from the mouth of a chronic talker of shit.
Regardless, President Trump has welcomed the commitment and said it could use all the human shields he could get in his deranged plot to make the price of fuel skyrocket to $5 a litre.
A spokesperson from White House told The Times,
“We fully expect the Titanic II to do its part before meeting much the same fate as its muse when he hits one of those Iranian mines, which it will based on the coordinates we’ll give it, we thank you for minesweeping for us, Mr Palmer”
And what of the doomed seaman aboard the ill-fated vessel? Well, it’s a sacrifice these men are willing to make. Cynical, one might say.
Not to fear however, Australian seafarers, because the odds of Clive actually building this monstrous piece of floating shit are very slim.
Still, probably don’t be giving the man ideas, given all that free time he has from failing to buy his way into Parliament again.
This article is not brough to you by H Fong.