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Saturday, April 04, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Police called to Perth Maccas after man explains his 5 Fillet-O-Fish order has nothing to do with Good Friday

    A Perth McDonalds has been left scrambling for answers today after a man boldly entered the store and ordered 5 Fillet-O-Fish burgers without even a…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Local Seagulls Thank Catholic Guilt As They Prepare For Their Biggest Day Of The Year

    Good Friday is the official seagull grand final with over 500% more fish & chip munching families to terrorise in their endless pursuit for a…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Local mum reconsiders catholic guilt as cost-of-living means ol mate Cap’n Birds Eye is coming for lunch

    Local mum Patricia has seriously questioned her annual display of faith after realising that the weekend budget doesn’t allow for the frills of bougie fish…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Politics

    WA to Invoke Emergency Powers to Divert Froffs to Those Who Forgot to Stock Up Before Good Friday

    Roger Cook has called a special press conference to announce WA will be invoking emergency powers to stop the indignity of the Good Friday booze…

    Belle April 2, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    NASA Reveals Artemis Program Aims to Establish New Perth Suburb on Moon

    Plans for the latest Perth suburb in the ever-expansive sprawl have moved one step closer after the successful launch of the Orion as part of…

    Belle April 2, 2026
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Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Sports

AFL promises Flagmantle 8 business class sinks to piss in to even playing field 

Belle July 18, 2024

The AFL has responded to the furore over the Flagmantle chartered flight that saw players need to urinate into the sink due to a lack…

View More AFL promises Flagmantle 8 business class sinks to piss in to even playing field 
BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

Marriage On The Rocks After Wife Tries To Throw Out Antique 90’s Midori Illusion Shaker

Belle July 17, 2024

For over 20 years of married life, Brett’s antique mid 90’s Midori Illusion shaker lived happily in the back of the second row of the…

View More Marriage On The Rocks After Wife Tries To Throw Out Antique 90’s Midori Illusion Shaker
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Business

ex-BASE jumper now entering building contracts in WA to satisfy his risk-taking tendencies

Belle July 17, 2024

A former BASE jumper and all-around lunatic has revealed that throwing himself off buildings, antennae, bridges and cliffs no longer gives him the thrill it…

View More ex-BASE jumper now entering building contracts in WA to satisfy his risk-taking tendencies
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS From the Zoo

A Day In The Life Of A Law Graduate 

Belle July 17, 2024 A Day In The Life Of

6:30 am – crywank in the shower until I am sufficiently purged of all bodily fluids that will get in my way today. I am an…

View More A Day In The Life Of A Law Graduate 
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

Local millionaire spotted with a can of pre-mix and a dart from a recognisable brand

Belle July 15, 2024

Onlookers were treated to a taste of how the other side live today when SOR resident Macka walked out onto his balcony with a can…

View More Local millionaire spotted with a can of pre-mix and a dart from a recognisable brand
Lifestyle, Love & Parenting

The Kmart Mummy

Belle July 15, 2024 Mummy

K-Mart is the mecca of full-time mummies who gleefully brag about blowing $500 from the family budget when they only wanted a throw rug or…

View More The Kmart Mummy

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Police called to Perth Maccas after man explains his 5 Fillet-O-Fish order has nothing to do with Good Friday
  • Local Seagulls Thank Catholic Guilt As They Prepare For Their Biggest Day Of The Year
  • Local mum reconsiders catholic guilt as cost-of-living means ol mate Cap’n Birds Eye is coming for lunch
  • WA to Invoke Emergency Powers to Divert Froffs to Those Who Forgot to Stock Up Before Good Friday
  • NASA Reveals Artemis Program Aims to Establish New Perth Suburb on Moon
  • Albanese Expected to Remind Nation West Coast Are Back in Tonight’s Address

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