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Friday, December 12, 2025
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Crack team of pastry chefs deployed to South Perth to deal with late night baking epidemic

    South Perth residents have been moaning that young people are living their best life and indulging in late night baking sessions on the foreshore. Among…

    Belle December 11, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Technology & Finance

    Nature is healing as kids banned from socials return to Galleria bus port to settle beef

    The Albanese Government is celebrating another triumph this morning as hundreds of under 16s ditch trading barbs over socials for good ol fashion scuffling at…

    Belle December 11, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Technology & Finance

    Under-16s social media ban declared a win as kids rediscover the art of pelting honky nuts at each other

    All eyes were on Australia today as the Under 16s social media ban came into effect.  Many experts were debating how the kids were going…

    Belle December 10, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

    Congestion on regional roads solved after “overtaking lane ahead” signs placed every 100m

    Main Roads WA have been praised for their genius initiative to ensure grey nomads towing caravans don’t clog up regional roads anymore.  The solution? To…

    Belle December 9, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Ellenbrook Line declared a disaster as new figures reveal Perth dealing with thousands of Ellenbrook commuters every day

    The Western Australian Government has apologised to the people of Perth after the new Ellenbrook Line delivered on the threat of bringing thousands of Ellenbrook…

    Belle December 8, 2025
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Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS

Perth Motorists Urged To Reconsider Driving After Almost 0.8mm Of Rain Hits

Belle April 30, 2024

Emergency services are urging Perth motorists to reconsider their need to travel by road given the unbridled shittery already seen after some light precipitation today.…

View More Perth Motorists Urged To Reconsider Driving After Almost 0.8mm Of Rain Hits
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

Surfer Joes Owner “Unconcerned” With Perth’s Wet Forecast

Belle April 28, 2024

Gazing nonchalantly at his novelty weather app, Simmo from Kwinana allegedly told a mate he “didn’t give a shit” about the forecasted rain next week.…

View More Surfer Joes Owner “Unconcerned” With Perth’s Wet Forecast
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

Success declared as Joondalup threatens to boycott train line over Yanchep name change 

Belle April 27, 2024

The citizens of Perth are chalking up a recent threat by the Joondalup people to boycott the train system over the “Yanchep Line” name change…

View More Success declared as Joondalup threatens to boycott train line over Yanchep name change 
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS From the Zoo

What your favourite piece of iconic Perth architecture says about you

Belle April 27, 2024

East Perth Public Transport Centre – your lust for a brutalist lifestyle knows no bounds. Your parents probably played death metal to you instead of lullabies.…

View More What your favourite piece of iconic Perth architecture says about you
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS From the Zoo

Applying 8 common AFL rules to your social life

Belle April 26, 2024 AFLFooty

Substitution – at any stage of a pub session, the main group can substitute “your mate” for any reason but typically due to poor performance. This…

View More Applying 8 common AFL rules to your social life
Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Regional

WA declines Japan’s enthusiastic offer to help search for pod of whales that stranded yesterday

Belle April 26, 2024

The Great Nation of Japan has extended an offer to Western Australia they believed we couldn’t refuse after dozens of pilot whales were rescued yesterday…

View More WA declines Japan’s enthusiastic offer to help search for pod of whales that stranded yesterday

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Crack team of pastry chefs deployed to South Perth to deal with late night baking epidemic
  • Nature is healing as kids banned from socials return to Galleria bus port to settle beef
  • Under-16s social media ban declared a win as kids rediscover the art of pelting honky nuts at each other
  • Congestion on regional roads solved after “overtaking lane ahead” signs placed every 100m
  • Ellenbrook Line declared a disaster as new figures reveal Perth dealing with thousands of Ellenbrook commuters every day
  • WA announces BCF shirt buyback as fish ban set to decimate displays of boating incompetence 

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