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Wednesday, November 05, 2025
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre

    A local Perth tradesman who is thought to be responsible for over 1000 ruined tyres per month has finally admitted his patented carelessness with nails…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up

    A festival poster stuck to a fence has once again ruined an ageing millennials day as he did his best to recognise more than 1…

    Belle November 5, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times Business Entertainment

    Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning

    A Perth bogan who found himself over refreshed and dangerously gee’d up has been counting his blessings while sitting in his piss soaked trousers at…

    Belle November 4, 2025
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

    Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 

    Authorities have put out an alert that it is highly likely you may fail a piss-test tomorrow if you were within a kilometre of the…

    Belle November 2, 2025
    View More
  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS

    Royal Family tells loyal subjects that the most horrific punishment they could think of for Andrew was making him one of you

    The Royal Family has sent a clear message to its loyal subjects that a Royal being reduced to a filthy, shiteating member of the public…

    Belle October 31, 2025
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BREAKING NEWS Politics

BREAKING: The USA has denied any involvement in last night’s drone strike on the Swan River

Belle November 21, 2022

Top US Brass has issued a statement today denying any involvement after hundreds of Perth residents witnessed a drone strike on the Swan River last…

View More BREAKING: The USA has denied any involvement in last night’s drone strike on the Swan River
BREAKING NEWS Sports

WA World Cup fan officially farewells normal sleep pattern, prepares to become a creature

Belle November 21, 2022

Dom has conceded that the next 28 days will be an emotional rollercoaster for himself and everyone around him due in no small part to…

View More WA World Cup fan officially farewells normal sleep pattern, prepares to become a creature
when will the whites be running wa
BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

“The whites are running!” – Perth crayfisherman mistakes Diner en Blanc for start of season

Belle November 20, 2022

A lightly toasted and generously sauced WA crayfisherman was celebrating a friend’s birthday in a Northbridge apartment yesterday. After taking to the balcony to have…

View More “The whites are running!” – Perth crayfisherman mistakes Diner en Blanc for start of season
WA Culture & Notable Events

Mr Diner en Blanc

Belle November 20, 2022

While Anthony thought he was dressed like P Diddy at a #whitelivesmatter function, in reality, he paid $200 in rental costs to look like a…

View More Mr Diner en Blanc
BREAKING NEWS Sports

Qatar World Cup beer ban shocks fans as they wonder how Budweiser managed to meet a recognised definition of beer

Belle November 19, 2022

Qatar’s decision to ban the sale of froffs at World Cup games has caused mass confusion in the soccer world with many questioning how Budweiser…

View More Qatar World Cup beer ban shocks fans as they wonder how Budweiser managed to meet a recognised definition of beer
BREAKING NEWS

Winter returns for the most unwanted comeback tour of 2022

Belle November 18, 2022

Storming into Perth for an impromptu yet totally unwanted comeback tour, winter has returned for an encore that no one asked for. Stunning audiences with…

View More Winter returns for the most unwanted comeback tour of 2022

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Tradie notoriously careless with his screws & nails admits he’s on the payroll of big tyre
  • Ageing millennial never feels older than when looking at a festival line up
  • Central accommodation, a feed and already dressed for his date with the Magistrate, Ascot race day Bogan winning
  • Piss-test fail warning given to anyone within a kilometre radius of the Metallica pit 
  • Royal Family tells loyal subjects that the most horrific punishment they could think of for Andrew was making him one of you
  • Boomers warned as Perth kid plans to dress as a Daylight Saving referendum for Halloween

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  • Moving down train carriage far too similar to merging for Perth to feel comfortable attempting
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