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Friday, April 03, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Police called to Perth Maccas after man explains his 5 Fillet-O-Fish order has nothing to do with Good Friday

    A Perth McDonalds has been left scrambling for answers today after a man boldly entered the store and ordered 5 Fillet-O-Fish burgers without even a…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Local Seagulls Thank Catholic Guilt As They Prepare For Their Biggest Day Of The Year

    Good Friday is the official seagull grand final with over 500% more fish & chip munching families to terrorise in their endless pursuit for a…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Local mum reconsiders catholic guilt as cost-of-living means ol mate Cap’n Birds Eye is coming for lunch

    Local mum Patricia has seriously questioned her annual display of faith after realising that the weekend budget doesn’t allow for the frills of bougie fish…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Politics

    WA to Invoke Emergency Powers to Divert Froffs to Those Who Forgot to Stock Up Before Good Friday

    Roger Cook has called a special press conference to announce WA will be invoking emergency powers to stop the indignity of the Good Friday booze…

    Belle April 2, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    NASA Reveals Artemis Program Aims to Establish New Perth Suburb on Moon

    Plans for the latest Perth suburb in the ever-expansive sprawl have moved one step closer after the successful launch of the Orion as part of…

    Belle April 2, 2026
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BREAKING NEWS Featured Politics

WA Government Imposes Tax On Nike TNs To Slow The Eshayification Of Perth Suburbs

Belle January 2, 2023

Move over spicy cough, the latest scourge facing this great mining State is the creeping influence of Eshay culture among Perf youths. At least according…

View More WA Government Imposes Tax On Nike TNs To Slow The Eshayification Of Perth Suburbs
BREAKING NEWS

Top 8 Passengers You Want To Avoid On Your Next Flight

Belle January 2, 2023

The shoeless wonder – there is nothing like waking up after take off to the smell of a shire-dwelling plane hobbit’s Bega cheese & vegemite feet…

View More Top 8 Passengers You Want To Avoid On Your Next Flight
BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

Double Brick Home Owner Offsets Aircon Bill By Leasing Lounge to Pizzeria

Belle January 2, 2023 WA Culture

Since Jerome was a boy he’d always dreamed of a double brick home. His grandpa and father had both religiously stuck to the style due…

View More Double Brick Home Owner Offsets Aircon Bill By Leasing Lounge to Pizzeria
BREAKING NEWS True-ish Crime

Hoon Regrets Attitude Somewhat After Cop Slaps A Canary On Crooked

Belle January 2, 2023

A Perth hoon has lamented his aggressive bravado after being pulled over this morning after the cops decided to give his car a thorough inspection.…

View More Hoon Regrets Attitude Somewhat After Cop Slaps A Canary On Crooked
Featured From the Zoo

Top 4 Signs Mario Kart 64 Has Got The Better Of You

Belle January 1, 2023

Emotions are running too high – Get ready to powerslide through the full spectrum of emotions on the instability rainbow. See, Mario Kart was designed…

View More Top 4 Signs Mario Kart 64 Has Got The Better Of You
BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

“Perth is not a big country town!” Says Man Doing His Best To Look Like A Jackaroo Everyday

Belle January 1, 2023

A man who works on the Terrace as a corporate miner has refuted allegations from his Melbourne friends that Perth is just a “big country…

View More “Perth is not a big country town!” Says Man Doing His Best To Look Like A Jackaroo Everyday

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Police called to Perth Maccas after man explains his 5 Fillet-O-Fish order has nothing to do with Good Friday
  • Local Seagulls Thank Catholic Guilt As They Prepare For Their Biggest Day Of The Year
  • Local mum reconsiders catholic guilt as cost-of-living means ol mate Cap’n Birds Eye is coming for lunch
  • WA to Invoke Emergency Powers to Divert Froffs to Those Who Forgot to Stock Up Before Good Friday
  • NASA Reveals Artemis Program Aims to Establish New Perth Suburb on Moon
  • Albanese Expected to Remind Nation West Coast Are Back in Tonight’s Address

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