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Friday, April 03, 2026
The Bell Tower Times
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Police called to Perth Maccas after man explains his 5 Fillet-O-Fish order has nothing to do with Good Friday

    A Perth McDonalds has been left scrambling for answers today after a man boldly entered the store and ordered 5 Fillet-O-Fish burgers without even a…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Local Seagulls Thank Catholic Guilt As They Prepare For Their Biggest Day Of The Year

    Good Friday is the official seagull grand final with over 500% more fish & chip munching families to terrorise in their endless pursuit for a…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Lifestyle

    Local mum reconsiders catholic guilt as cost-of-living means ol mate Cap’n Birds Eye is coming for lunch

    Local mum Patricia has seriously questioned her annual display of faith after realising that the weekend budget doesn’t allow for the frills of bougie fish…

    Belle April 3, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Politics

    WA to Invoke Emergency Powers to Divert Froffs to Those Who Forgot to Stock Up Before Good Friday

    Roger Cook has called a special press conference to announce WA will be invoking emergency powers to stop the indignity of the Good Friday booze…

    Belle April 2, 2026
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  • Bell Tower Times BREAKING NEWS Local

    NASA Reveals Artemis Program Aims to Establish New Perth Suburb on Moon

    Plans for the latest Perth suburb in the ever-expansive sprawl have moved one step closer after the successful launch of the Orion as part of…

    Belle April 2, 2026
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BREAKING NEWS

REPORT: sons of Perth’s boat owners have about 1 hour to replace those flares 

Belle December 4, 2022

The Socceroos’ 2-1 loss to Lionel Messi (or Argentina as the team is sometimes known) was celebrated through the night in Northbridge with fans letting…

View More REPORT: sons of Perth’s boat owners have about 1 hour to replace those flares 
Featured From the Zoo

Why a Bali Bonk Ban Will Be Fark All 

Belle December 3, 2022

You can imagine my suproiiise when I came across an article this morning during me 3rd morning shit. Those Bali dogs are threatening to take…

View More Why a Bali Bonk Ban Will Be Fark All 
BREAKING NEWS

Millennial’s claims she went to the beach not believed in the absence of even one story post

Belle December 2, 2022

Stephanie has been met with a fierce wall of disbelief after telling a group of friends that she went to the beach the other day.…

View More Millennial’s claims she went to the beach not believed in the absence of even one story post
BREAKING NEWS Local

WA urges commuters to relax, Roe St upgrade should be done by next Halley’s Comet 

Belle December 2, 2022

The WA Government has heard the constant grumblings from city commuters about the Roe St clusterfuck and has assured them that they can take a…

View More WA urges commuters to relax, Roe St upgrade should be done by next Halley’s Comet 
BREAKING NEWS Entertainment

CoComelon heavy Spotify Wrapped playlist the final nail in young dad’s partying coffin

Belle December 1, 2022

“This is who I am now”, a young father lamented after checking out his Spotify Wrapped playlist for 2022 to see it absolutely dominated by…

View More CoComelon heavy Spotify Wrapped playlist the final nail in young dad’s partying coffin
Reckons Featured

PART 2 of How to Avoid Offending West Aussies

Belle November 30, 2022

So you’ve learned the basics, now time for some nuance.  Respecting the Boomtown – In WA, people are very passionate about the fact the WA…

View More PART 2 of How to Avoid Offending West Aussies

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TRENDING NEWS

  • Police called to Perth Maccas after man explains his 5 Fillet-O-Fish order has nothing to do with Good Friday
  • Local Seagulls Thank Catholic Guilt As They Prepare For Their Biggest Day Of The Year
  • Local mum reconsiders catholic guilt as cost-of-living means ol mate Cap’n Birds Eye is coming for lunch
  • WA to Invoke Emergency Powers to Divert Froffs to Those Who Forgot to Stock Up Before Good Friday
  • NASA Reveals Artemis Program Aims to Establish New Perth Suburb on Moon
  • Albanese Expected to Remind Nation West Coast Are Back in Tonight’s Address

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