WA urges commuters to relax, Roe St upgrade should be done by next Halley’s Comet 

The WA Government has heard the constant grumblings from city commuters about the Roe St clusterfuck and has assured them that they can take a chill pill. She’ll be ready right in time to enjoy the next glorious viewing of Halley’s Comet. About 2062. 

The message coming from the WA Government is very clear. Stop whinging about the neverending shitshow on Roe and focus your mind on the upcoming “Halley’s on Roe” viewing event where the ribbon will be cut. 

We spoke to a Northbridge resident who can’t remember the last time Roe St wasn’t a nightmare. He told The Times,

“It’s good to have a date of completion, you know? Sure it’s 40 years away but I reckon that’s pretty good for a relatively minor Government infrastructure project. I’m looking forward to seeing that Comet too. They know how to seal a deal”

Although not everyone in the community is impressed by this revised timeline. With one punter telling The Times that he’s pretty close to going postal. Adding,

“Have you ever seen someone actually working on Roe St? Wtf are they doing. If they deliver this by the next Halley’s Comet I’ll be shocked. Set a realistic time frame. At least 80 years”

City dwellers can rest assured they’ll be cruising down Roe St in peace before Ellenbrook finally get their traino. You can take solace in that. 

RELATED READING: 6 hot tips for transitioning into your new life as an inner-city tosser

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?